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The Super-Mom Syndrome

Ever find yourself saying something to your kids like, “I may look like super-mom, but I’m not.”

I’m guilty, especially during those moments when one child asks me for a snack, at the very time I’m cleaning up the spilled milk of another, while one daughter is telling me about her day, and another child is calling me from upstairs.

I stop, and yes, somewhat sarcastically remark, “Hey guys, slow down. You might think I have ten arms and ten legs, but I don’t.”

Lately, I’ve noticed some of my friends putting me in the category of super-mom too. A couple months ago, my daughters were invited to a St. Patrick’s Day cookie-making party at a friend’s house. The mom, a sweet friend of mine, had decorated with streamers, a green table cloth, and cute stickers. She had homemade dough, cookie cutters, frosting, and fancy decorations of every variety. It was little girl heaven.

When I arrived at pick-up time, my friend introduced me to another mom. “And this is Jody. She has five kids, homeschools, and she writes books. I don’t know how she manages to do it all. She’s super-mom.”

Of course I mumbled something like, “Oh, thanks. But I’m not really super-mom. Not in the least.”

But as I walked out the door and thanked her, I said, “You’re amazing. I couldn’t possibly have done all that you did today—with the cookies and decorations and big mess all over the kitchen.” In my mind, at that moment, she was the epitome of super-mom. She’d accomplished something effortlessly that I would’ve had a very hard time doing.

The incident made me think of other friends and their maternal super powers. One friend can organize care packages for shut-ins and oversea soldiers like she was born doing it. Another can grow a garden and preserve her produce better than the early pioneers. And still another involves herself in her children’s theater productions and enjoys all the hours and hours of practice.

When I really stop to think about all my friends, I realize each of them is a super-mom in their own unique way. We all have unique gifts and abilities. Each of us puts forth incredible amounts of effort and dedication to our talents.

As a writing mother, I’m simply using my talent and passion for my writing in a similar way other moms put their hearts into their activities and ministries. What makes us all super, is that we’re striving to use our gifts the best we possibly can.

Yes, there are challenges unique to the writing life. For most of us, writing is an unpaid or underpaid part time job that we try to squeeze around everything else. We have high hopes for publication and our writing is certainly much more than a mere hobby.

But am I super-mom because I’m pursuing my particular passion while I’m juggling all my other roles? I don’t think so. Not more than any other parent who’s chasing after his or her dreams.

So, next time one of my friends calls me super-mom, I’ll make sure to remind them that they are too. And next time my kids decide they ALL need me at exactly the same moment, I’ll remind them that I AM indeed super-mom, but that they can have super powers too!

Happy Mother’s Day to all you Super-Moms.

Has anyone ever called you Super-Mom? Who are some of the Super-Moms in your life? Please share! I love when we can find quiet confidence in our own talents while rejoicing in the strengths of others.

238 comments:

  1. Can't claim to have ever been called a super mom: I don't have kids.

    But my own mother was pretty super: she could read a James Michener novel in two days, quote huge chunks of it from memory afterward, and still take care of the entire family...

    The love of reading is one of the greatest gifts she gave me, and I still can't read as fast she did let alone quote from memory.

    ReplyDelete
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  2. I think both my grandmother's were supermoms. They had to be. They both had ten children! Ten! How does that even work? (well...I do know how it works in THAT sense, but you know what I mean)

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  3. It feels awkward when someone calls you 'Super Mom'. Is it really a complement or do they think you're crazy? I have four kids and ailing parents I care for. I think you hit it home when you mentioned that everyone has something to offer. Our differences are what make us stronger.

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  4. The moms I tend to call supermoms are either super active in volunteering at school with young kids or they homeschool! They reach super status when they do things that I have no desire to do. If you homeschool with 5 kids and write, then yes, you're definitely supermom status! Sorry to break it to you. :)

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  5. Um, well... I am super MOM! :) I even have super powers like 'eyes in the back of my head' (yes boys I can see what you are doing when you don't think I am looking!) and other powers like 'cook dinner, talk on phone, feed dog and bath children all at once. Yeah. Really. :)

    Have a great weekend Jody. Sounds to me like you are a super mom too :)

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  6. I think you are a super mom if you can commit to your passion while at the same time being passionate about raising your family. That puts you on the list Jody!

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  7. Oh...Jody, I love rejoicing in the strengths of others (especially my women peeps). It's truly one of my favorite things to do.

    My mom is so dear to me. She is such a positive person and she has instilled such a love of learning in me. I'm deeply grateful for her.

    I love when people look at me shocked when I tell them how many novels I've written. It's always followed with one of two questions:
    "How do you find the time?"
    "When do you write?"

    I usually answer the same way. "Once I learned how to lock that closet door from the outside my kids have learned to be real quiet." :D

    Happy Mother's Day.
    ~ Wendy

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  8. I definitely have a difficult time admitting I'm a super mom with so many failures and all, but you are right, each mom has their own strengths and talents to share, and I'm blessed to know moms who are more crafty than I, love to take in many children at once for whole afternoons, moms who have the time and energy to volunteer for EVERY school party when I cannot. And I know that I am good at carpooling seven soccer players at once.

    But, for today (and Sunday) and always, I am thankful for my own super mom, who had a gigantic part in using her incredible strength and talent to make me who I am today.

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  9. You'd look great in that SuperMan suit. Especially the cape. ;)

    I'm only a mother to two dogs--which doesn't require any super powers. But I give all you real moms major credit for all you do.

    Happy Mother's Day!

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  10. I used to be called Supermom, but twenty years of that wore me out, and I willingly relinquished the title. LOL!

    Stop by my blog and read my tribute to moms -- http://chicki663.webs.com/apps/blog/show/3675805-tribute

    Have a great day on Sunday!

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  11. What an absolutely wonderful post! I've had people think that about me because of different things, like a clean house or something. Like you said though, everyone has such different talents.
    One friend thinks I'm SO patient (I disagree, but that's another story *grin*) anyway, she marvels at that and I'm like, yeah, but I have NO patience to sit and do letters with my kids like you do. Her three year old knew the entire alphabet!!! I'm amazed by moms who do that stuff. Or arts and crafts. I hate those and it's hard for me to put that flesh aside and do something "fun" with my kiddos. LOL
    Here's to Super-Moms everywhere and to the Super-God who made us!!! :-)

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  12. Thankfully we all are super moms in our own right. Specific talents fro our families and situations. Happy Mother's Day to you! :O)

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  13. Happy Mother's Day! You're right. We all bring unique gifts and talents to the mothering and world table. We should celebrate our strengths!

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  14. You homeschool too!!! Now I really feel like a slacker, no just kidding:) Honestly though, you are right we each have our own gifts and talents and what might seem amazing to some comes easier to others. Not to mention that all moms have their own set of goals and priorities. I think the important thing as mothers is that we are true to ourselves, allow God to lead us, and to enjoy the moments we have with our children.

    Happy Mother's Day!

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  15. My Spiritual Master Amma, and my Mother are both super moms. Amma takes care of her million children (devotees) all over the world, while mom looks after the entire family,while at the same time pursuing her own interests, but, both tend to neglect their health. For me they epitomise super moms.
    Happy Mother's Day!

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  16. When the movie The Incredibles came out, my family and I joked about which super-powers would serve me best as a mom . . . superspeed, getting lots of things done at nearly the same time, or super-stretchiness, being able to listen to one daughter in one room while helping my youngest daughter do a bead craft in the other room?
    It would be hard to choose a superpower.

    All joking aside, I love the idea of encouraging all the supermoms we have in our lives, and highlighting their real life super-influence on our lives.

    My mom has the amazing ability to be an artist with any kind of art, and also be a wonderful grandmother to my daughters. She also is a great wife to my dad, and a great encourager to me, her adult daughter. She walks every day, rain or shine, hail or snow, and always has time to talk or listen.

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  17. It's hard to picture myself as a super-mom with only one child. For some reason, I reserve that status for women who have more children and still juggle everything.

    What a great way to think of ourselves though, especially the idea that we each have a unique gift that makes us super.

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  18. My mom was at all of the class parties, field trips and ballgames. She is a super mom, and now, she continues to be a super grandma, watching my son three days a week!.

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  19. Me? A SuperMom? Ha. I let The Husband take The Kiddo to pick up sun block and insect repellent for her field trip today. They got the spray kind that Mr. Universe couldn't work. Her teacher's SO gonna love me. SuperMom indeed!

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  20. I can so relate to the discomfort of this pronouncement, "Supermom!" I do a truckload of things and feel like I do none of them with excellence. But all my friends know is that I *do* them (and I wonder if I toot my own horn as how do they even know?). I allow their "kudos" to heap guilt and condemnation on me, rather than encourage me! I am so fragmented. I need to streamline my life, but for every thing I pluck out, it seems three new things pop up in its place. God is working on me, I know...

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  21. What a sweet post, Jody. I think you are a super mom too, by the way. I don't know how you can home-school and write! You are my hero.

    I'm not a Super-mom (the pile of unwashed laundry and sticky kitchen floor proves this), but I think I am good mom. My kids know I love them and all of their needs are met.

    My mom is my example. She was a wonderful mother to 6 kids. She volunteered in all of our classes. She attended every concert and athletic event. She made dinner every night. And she was (and still is) a professional artist. She's an inspiring person and a super-mom.

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  22. Your post was so sweet. I think it's great to remind ourselves and others that we all have our own super powers. We're all good at different things and that's what makes us so unique and special.

    Have a great Mother's Day!

    ReplyDelete
  23. I have been called a super-mom before, but I know I'm just a normal mom with a busy life. Family, writing, homeschooling, church, etc.—there is not end to the work and the to-do lists.

    I believe that every mom is the super-mom of her own home. No one can be mom to your kids but you! That alone makes you super-mom!

    ReplyDelete
  24. This is a such a sweet post. I'm not a mom, and the older I get the more and more I appreciate my mother (and all mothers) for everything she's done for me and my sister and brothers. And everything she continues to do for us! It's amazing what all mothers can do!

    Have a wonderful Mother's Day, Jody!!!

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  25. In retrospect I think my mother modelled the kind of lifestyle that took me thirty years to learn to follow! She was a quiet, private person who lived a quiet, private life. While like her in many ways, I as a pastor's wife and mother of four, tried to do everything and be everything to everyone in my home, church and community... until I had a breakdown. In that year of recovery I re-evaluated who I was and what God expected of me. I learned to focus more on my talents and specific priorities.

    Now I look at my married children and am in awe of all they accomplish while still being beautiful, well grounded, well balanced individuals. They're the "super" people in my life.

    Happy Mother's Day to you, Jody. :)

    ReplyDelete
  26. I think you're a super-mom.

    And this was a really great post. Because we are all given different talents and abilities and shouldn't put ourselves down for the things we can't do. We should be celebrating ourselves and each other for the things we can.

    Sounds like you've got some amazing friends! (Which isn't a surprise, since you're pretty amazing, too!)

    ReplyDelete
  27. What a nice post! My little one is 5 and she really does think I'm a Super Hero. It's so awesome to feel like you have amazing powers and can do anything. I'm enjoying it while it lasts, because one day the truth will be exposed! Oh well! Here's to all the Super Moms out there!
    Happy Mother's Day!

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  28. I've been called Super-mom by my husband, but I don't think anyone else has said it...so thanks!

    I think my mom is a Super-mom, she helps anyone and everyone who needs it, and takes such good care of our family.

    Hope your Mother's Day is full of all your favorite thigns!

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  29. hmmm very good thoughts. Pretty cool how God gave us each our own "superpowers" huh? :D

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  30. Nope, have NEVER been called a super mom.

    But have gotten lots of "I love yous." With my flawed personality, that's a huge gift from God!!

    Have a good weekend, Jody!
    Patti

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  31. I hear that super mom comment a lot from people and I don't feel I deserve it. I can easily name ten other mom's who are much more worthier of the title. Have a great mother's day!!!! Super mom of five! (you not me ;)

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  32. Well put: We're all super in our own way. The trick is to remember that!! ;)

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  33. People who have called me a "supermom" are those who have seen just a sliver of who I really am, the outside busy part.

    You are so right when you say each mom has their own gifts and talents that others admire. Sadly, too often we see our failings and admire others gifts and talents as more valuable than our own.

    The only thing that really makes us super is the Maker who made us.

    Solomon sums it up best: "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; BUT A WOMAN WHO FEARS THE LORD IS TO BE PRAISED!

    Happy Mother's Day!
    Susan

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  34. Your generosity of spirit and ability to share your gifts are just part of your super powers. What a lovely Mothers' Day tribute.

    ReplyDelete
  35. I've been called Super Mom. I hate that label. To me it stems from false assumptions, like when people say, "Oh, you have SEVEN children! You must be SO organized!" ... anyone who really knows me knows I am very NOT organized. When someone says something about being a 'super mom' I feel bad, because I feel like they see a lie. I'm just a regular mom, trying to do a good job. Some things, by God's grace, I do well. I'm a pretty good cook and enjoy creative birthday cakes. :) Other things I am fumbling, struggling, and dropping balls. And for that reason, I am very thankful for God's grace. :-)

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  36. Hi Jody -

    Since I've never raised a child, I can't speak from experience. However, I can recognize a supermom when I see her. My Mom definitely fits the bill.

    Blessings,
    Susan :)

    ReplyDelete
  37. Wise words. I think we all can benefit from encouraging other moms in their strengths and talents. From one super mom to another :) Happy Mother's Day!

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  38. I think you are a super mom. Happy Mother's Day.

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  39. As much as I want to have kids SOMEDAY, I'm glad for now I can focus on just me. That'll make me even more ready when it's time for little ones! Plus, it's still fun to smother my mom with favors on Mother's Day. Have a happy one!

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  40. Jody, I hope you had a fabulous Mother's Day. I have heard, "How do you do it all?" before, but I am quick to point out the many things that go undone in the Salonen household. No one can do it all, not even those of us with a few super powers under our belts, or capes, or wherever it is we keep them. I do think one thing in our lives gives us a little extra boost in our mothering, however: faith. Through God, all things are possible.

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  41. Funny that I'm following Roxane whom I call my best writer-mama-pal. I get that same question, or "I don't know how you do it." I say that I don't do it all myself. I use the "Village." I learned to say yes to help, and to accept that I can't do it all. Having twins taught me that! Charmaine Clancy helped me with this, too. She wrote once on her blog that when her kids ask if she has a band-aide in her purse, she reminds them that she's "not that kind of mum." I like that. We're all different kinds of "mums." I'm the one who comes to school to help with writing and dramas, and plays piano at church, and sings lyrics at any moment. I write notes on every scrap of paper and I don't get worked up if the shoes are cluttering the entry or the beds aren't made, because I'm not "that kind of mun." I wouldn't be able to organize a big party with all the fixing without much stress and an important item forgotten. Great post. You're a super mom in your own way. God bless all super moms!

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  42. I've been called Super Mom and it's a wonderful compliment. We aren't perfect, but we strive to be the best we can for our kids. No matter how much we achieve or what we screw up, each of us is a Super Mom in her own way. <3

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