tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post6991495707833711496..comments2024-03-29T03:42:04.742-04:00Comments on Author, Jody Hedlund: Everyone Gets Jealous, Even Published AuthorsJody Hedlundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comBlogger45125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-12933194355524457322012-09-10T21:54:36.036-04:002012-09-10T21:54:36.036-04:00Thank you for stopping by, Amber! :-)Thank you for stopping by, Amber! :-)Jody Hedlundhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-79062922436952005342012-09-10T18:37:55.973-04:002012-09-10T18:37:55.973-04:00Thanks for sharing such an honest post. Thanks for sharing such an honest post. Amber Danehttp://dain54.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-53989390059413392792012-05-31T03:14:21.204-04:002012-05-31T03:14:21.204-04:00I think jealousy may also have something to do wit...I think jealousy may also have something to do with the fact that you see a talent in others that you know is right there in yourself (if only you could reach it). <br /><br />Brilliant blog - thank you.Sally Crawfordhttp://writerslondon.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-89096511847632567542012-05-21T19:42:55.263-04:002012-05-21T19:42:55.263-04:00Hi Jody! Thank you so much for your honesty in thi...Hi Jody! Thank you so much for your honesty in this post. As an unpublished (pre-published?) author, I've been jealous of so many things. Especially writers who signed with an agent for their first novel. It was tough to put my "baby" in a drawer, but now that I've completed and polished my second novel, I can see how much I've improved. I'm still waiting for that next step (to sign with an agent. But I felt genuine happiness for a writer friend who signed recently because she has worked so hard, and it isn't her first book either. I handle my jealousy by focusing on the positive and being grateful for the small successes. :)Meredithhttp://thetroublewithtwentytwo.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-37731629936530614982012-05-21T14:59:57.339-04:002012-05-21T14:59:57.339-04:00good stuff here! I read from another author how je...good stuff here! I read from another author how jealous writers can hurt other writers--posting insanely negative reviews on GR, for example. And I was prompted to do a post making the point you just made. It helps us ALL when any of us are successful. Without the big money authors, publishers couldn't afford to give us little fish a chance. And what a great encouragement! Use those feelings to get better.<br /><br />Best, Jody~ :o)LTMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05239077455322030275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-3452978129974384842012-05-21T12:48:41.094-04:002012-05-21T12:48:41.094-04:00As usual...I love dropping by because of your thou...As usual...I love dropping by because of your thoughtful and honest posts. This was definitely something I've struggled with lately. And then several friends and family members asked me what I was going to do about it. Of course I had to take a deep breath and stand back to reevaluate my path.Chelle Sandellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03813658527826989105noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-21185849689207018182012-05-21T11:22:47.870-04:002012-05-21T11:22:47.870-04:00Jody: For me, jealousy leads to self-doubt. I'...Jody: For me, jealousy leads to self-doubt. I'll never write as well as someone else. Or somebody has a better blog with a larger audience - why don't I? Reading James Scott Bell's comment with his advice on how to handle jealousy really made sense to me. You can be sure I'll apply his logic. So glad my Crit Partner, Martha Ramirez (who always finds the best blogs), directed me to your post!Sheri Fredrickshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03994182452859135844noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-9920512392946692912012-05-20T23:24:50.873-04:002012-05-20T23:24:50.873-04:00Thank you, Jody, for a great post that touched on ...Thank you, Jody, for a great post that touched on something all of us need to consider. I've been contemplating my use of social media a great deal recently. I've concluded that not only is it bad for my mental health, it's toxic to my soul. And body. Today, my wrists and shoulders ached from the hours I've spent on line. Almost all those hours involved responding to people in the zillions of forums, FB groups, etc. in which I participate. That participation doesn't come from desire to "connect"; it's because I think it's necessary for my career. My first book was published in 2007––Stepping Off the Edge: Learning & Living Spiritual Practice. I've been thinking about how I felt when I wrote that book vs. now. Back when I wrote Stepping, I practiced what I preached. I felt great. Now, I'm jaded. What am I practicing? Social media. I'm thinking about opting out of most of my media activity. I'm scared stiff: Will my Klout score hit zero? Will my sales tank if I'm not jabbering over the 'net all day? Is participating in social media something a successful author MUST do? I'll find out.Sandy Nathanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00278726452044155395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-19278943091107596612012-05-18T23:53:37.213-04:002012-05-18T23:53:37.213-04:00I love your blog, Jody, both for the writing insig...I love your blog, Jody, both for the writing insights and the personal honesty.<br /><br />Someone once told me that we get jealous because we always look up rather than down when we compare ourselves to others.<br /><br />On that basis, Jody, I'm pleased to offer myself as your personal anti-jealousy agent. Next time the green-eyed monster assails you, simply check out my website.<br /><br />I only have a one book deal (gasp), and although I think my publisher is great, they do Ebook format only (snigger).<br /><br />After examining the lowly condition of my writing career, your sense of peace and tranquility will be restored and you can sail onwards and upwards to better things! :-)Pete Abelahttp://peteabela.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-45938438800264301292012-05-18T20:14:31.067-04:002012-05-18T20:14:31.067-04:00Thank you Jody, and others, for your honesty. I h...Thank you Jody, and others, for your honesty. I head off to a writer's conference in a few minutes. This was just what I needed to hear.Mary Bauerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05615701194915209856noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-29358021895562671842012-05-18T11:50:57.196-04:002012-05-18T11:50:57.196-04:00Thank you, Jody, for your vulnerability. We all st...Thank you, Jody, for your vulnerability. We all struggle with this, but most of us are too chicken to admit it.<br /><br />I recently signed with an agent. And now, I have to very deliberately fight back the urges to be jealous of people who've advanced past that stage to publication. <br /><br />Thanks...Jennifer @ JenniferDukesLee.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15934656581948719407noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-71677878737637091522012-05-18T11:23:37.464-04:002012-05-18T11:23:37.464-04:00Thanks for your honesty. I think I could use more ...Thanks for your honesty. I think I could use more of your drive to get things done. <br /><br />But here's the honest, unedited thought that rose up in me as I read your post. It makes me very vulnerable to share this, but I think I should do it so here goes...<br /><br />I cannot fix this. Only God can. He has to break me of it. And I have seen him do it again and again, faithfully, patiently, tenderly. He brings me to situations which force me to confront the ambivalence I still carry as a child of God with a history of sin. I am torn between self-less worship and self-absorption. <br /><br />Envy is just one expression of the tension. Envy is like a tide. It comes in and out, rising and falling. As I mature, high tide is a little lower each time. But I cannot change. All heart-change is his work. My work is to respond to conviction when I am aware of it.Cassandra Frearhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16564236561567663914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-79206038308037091982012-05-18T11:16:08.298-04:002012-05-18T11:16:08.298-04:00Jody- I've been following you for a couple of ...Jody- I've been following you for a couple of years off and on. We even emailed back and forth a few times :). Your forthrightness is so needed in this industry so thank you for it.<br /><br /> Jealousy is a tough monster until you put it in Kingdom perspective. I just published my novel on Kindle and yes, I check the stats, excited when it's up on the bestseller list, but I also say- for your kingdom, if it touches just one... that's enough. It just keeps it all in perspective for me.Brigetta Schwaigerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15160073455357316887noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-15032080116597296132012-05-18T11:10:32.028-04:002012-05-18T11:10:32.028-04:00Fabulous advice. I am not a jealous person, in ge...Fabulous advice. I am not a jealous person, in general, but often the recipient of jealous comments. That's not humblebragging, either, because I don't mean book sales. I tend to put on a happy face and focus on the positive, and that elicits comments from others about how easy I have it in life, or how everything come easily to me, etc. etc. Nothing could be further from the truth. <br /><br />Thanks for this, and it's great advice for me as a writer. I would have Pinned it to Pinterest, but the button is wonky.Red Tashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18329547876023423333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-4999353382516465232012-05-18T11:08:35.491-04:002012-05-18T11:08:35.491-04:00Great post. I think it's human nature to alway...Great post. I think it's human nature to always want the greener grass, and to never fully appreciate what we already have. <br /><br />The danger is when a bit of green-eye turns into a spiral of negativity and depression about where we are and what we see as a lack of success. So while envy is normal, we need to shake it off before it damages us and our ability to keep moving forward. <br /><br />AngelaAngela Ackermanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01808259088625142389noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-41034508869620993652012-05-18T10:10:38.738-04:002012-05-18T10:10:38.738-04:00I can so relate to this as an unpublished book wri...I can so relate to this as an unpublished book writer. I can write a kickin' article or blog...but finish my book...books! Nope! Working at it every day!<br /><br />I thought I was the lone soldier when feeling the green monster creep up my chest and into my brain, especially when I read FB statuses about book contracts, word counts, celebrations of books being finished, along with boxes of printed material arriving! It is great to know I am not alone...most importantly, that I am normal!<br /><br />I must agree with the comment about God's timing in these things. I believe that God does have a plan and He is in control of when and where my book/s will be finished and then published...I may not even be here when they do. As long as I am writing...using His gift that He placed in me...making sure that I die empty of all the words and messages...then that is all that I am required to do through Him! <br /><br />Thank you for being so honest! I love your blog!shepherdess56https://www.blogger.com/profile/17242965170070616459noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-3022050763904736962012-05-18T09:37:06.913-04:002012-05-18T09:37:06.913-04:00Of course I've BTDT. And there is one other sl...Of course I've BTDT. And there is one other slant nobody has mentioned. I've been around a long time and I spent the early half of my career hanging around with professional speakers, sales people and consultants whose daily bread depended on self promotion. I knew the stories behind the stories the public saw. I played the game too and was always afraid I'd be "found out."<br /><br />Never forget that what we see online, and much of what we hear in person, is contrived for effect, and your jealousy is the desired effect. My hope today is that whatever success I happen to be blessed with can inspire others, not cause them fear and doubt. <br /><br />Glad you already know to be kind to yourself. Thanks for this super inspiring post!Sharon Lippincotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16269757107845288737noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-62035862099425498262012-05-18T09:10:56.014-04:002012-05-18T09:10:56.014-04:00Yes. I've definitely wrestled with jealousy! T...Yes. I've definitely wrestled with jealousy! This year it's gone to an even worse condition--depression. In the past, I've been jealous, but I've been able to give myself the pep talk that "someday it will happen for me." <br /><br />Now, the pep talk has gotten stale. It's just been so many years of putting in so much effort... I can barely muster jealousy, let alone excitement.<br /><br />I think jealousy actually can be good. When I'm jealous, there's still a part of me that is hopeful, a part that believes I'll have what they have someday. <br /><br />Sorry, don't mean to be a Debbie Downer. Hoping I can get jealous of someone soon! Ha! Ha!Jill Kemererhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07865493609868329393noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-88951492063667112012012-05-18T01:39:50.273-04:002012-05-18T01:39:50.273-04:00Such an important subject, Jody, and one I'll ...Such an important subject, Jody, and one I'll bet a lot of us hate to think about. Is this deep longing to reach my publication goal actually jealousy? I don't always know the difference between jealousy and desire. All I know is when I start wishing to be where others are, or somewhere other than where I am in my writing journey, the words of the tenth commandment usually pop into my mind: "Thou shalt not covet ... any thing that is thy neighbour's. (Exodus 20:17)<br /><br />That's sobering. It makes me wonder if that's what I'm doing, and it sends me to pray that I will stop wishing away the present in favour of an unknown future, and instead be thankful for the opportunities I have. <br /><br />I still have dreams, and goals that I will continue to strive for, but I think it helps keep some of the envy under control. :)Carol J. Garvinhttp://careann.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-72581769792313006362012-05-17T21:27:17.796-04:002012-05-17T21:27:17.796-04:00Thanks for all of the comment love today, everyone...Thanks for all of the comment love today, everyone! I'm so glad we could all commiserate together! :-)Jody Hedlundhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-36905901158597133102012-05-17T19:22:55.737-04:002012-05-17T19:22:55.737-04:00This is why all of us love you Jody, no matter wha...This is why all of us love you Jody, no matter what kind of genre we write. I LOOOOOVE this post and it's so true! But so good to hear.<br /><br />It's hard to be jealous of you because you're so nice and honest like this :)Sophia Changhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10946233873722107937noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-54288680353822463832012-05-17T17:49:51.399-04:002012-05-17T17:49:51.399-04:00Ohhhhhhhhhh I needed this, NEEDED this. Thankyou.Ohhhhhhhhhh I needed this, NEEDED this. Thankyou.Jennifer Majorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12696261499182486196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-84622590317289363802012-05-17T16:09:39.722-04:002012-05-17T16:09:39.722-04:00You. Are. Not. Alone.
Feel better? ;-) I've s...You. Are. Not. Alone.<br /><br />Feel better? ;-) I've seriously been fighting the green eyes too. I felt so ashamed and several times am just like, "God, please help me!"<br />LOL<br />It's embarrassing to admit but I guess it's natural. <br />The best thing I ever heard to fix jealousy is to pray good things for the person you're jealous of. I've done that several times (maybe thousands, lol) and it really helps.Jessica Nelsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12365768876905444157noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-10605161274844413732012-05-17T15:43:02.401-04:002012-05-17T15:43:02.401-04:00Well said, Jody!
I think every step of the publis...Well said, Jody!<br /><br />I think every step of the publishing process is difficult. It's really good to remember that things like jealousy don't go away after you have success.Nataliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00861022355718378425noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-77884238402863624182012-05-17T14:52:55.524-04:002012-05-17T14:52:55.524-04:00Great post, Jody and I too am jealous of your abil...Great post, Jody and I too am jealous of your ability to blog and seemingly do it all, but I know it's got to be a struggle. This is a tough business. And the green eyed monster slips under all our skins at some time or other. But life is too short. We just need to support each other and root for each other. I read a post over at the Kill Zone a while back by James Scott Bell and I think it was titled No Fear, No Meanness, No Envy. I think that should be our daily mantra. That Bell guy, he's just too smart. I think I'll be jealous of him too. No, no, no. Repeat after me: No Fear, No Meanness, No Envy.Jillian Kenthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12565274151603868808noreply@blogger.com