tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post4149501948523695446..comments2024-03-28T08:09:24.086-04:00Comments on Author, Jody Hedlund: Dealing With Writer's GuiltJody Hedlundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comBlogger65125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-89346494674751295932010-03-30T16:18:11.509-04:002010-03-30T16:18:11.509-04:00Jody, thanks for writing about such a poignant and...Jody, thanks for writing about such a poignant and ever-present topic for us writer-moms. :) You nailed it and have great advice.Dena Dyerhttp://www.denadyer.typepad.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-16317699073553922362010-03-27T21:32:36.366-04:002010-03-27T21:32:36.366-04:00“When I finally get an agent or book contract, I w...“When I finally get an agent or book contract, I won’t have to feel guilty anymore about spending so much time on my writing.”<br /><br />As a stay-at-home mom to a 4yo, I go through this a lot. Plus, I need quiet time to let my creativity blossom and I feel very guilty leaving my husband in the middle of the chaos so I can get to that creative place. Once again, thanks for letting me know I'm not the only one struggling with this. It helps.Kirsten Leskohttp://disobedientwriter.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-58387052064236711692010-03-25T02:40:39.232-04:002010-03-25T02:40:39.232-04:00This is a fine post, a reason why I keep on return...This is a fine post, a reason why I keep on returning to your blog.<br /><br />You are a sane writer with sage advice. Thank you for this!*https://www.blogger.com/profile/06484208765656281917noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-67903129442851144902010-03-24T12:54:10.875-04:002010-03-24T12:54:10.875-04:00I agree with you, scheduling is key. I have writin...I agree with you, scheduling is key. I have writing time and family time scheduled and when I am in those "times", I'm there and not thinking about the other.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-73225584201254409762010-03-24T02:15:36.371-04:002010-03-24T02:15:36.371-04:00You seem to always have the best posts and I somet...You seem to always have the best posts and I sometimes think we live in a parallel universe! Thanks for this Jody! I posted it on my blog because it's awesome, just like you are! :)Melonyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12316592864979427722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-65507925345774651762010-03-24T02:14:41.740-04:002010-03-24T02:14:41.740-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Melonyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12316592864979427722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-64299790385977585442010-03-23T17:09:46.982-04:002010-03-23T17:09:46.982-04:00This post could have come directly from the whispe...This post could have come directly from the whisperings of my heart. Once again, Jody, you always have just the right words at just the right time. Sometimes I think God uses you and your posts to get my attention. :-)Shannon O'Donnellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17299313309059235876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-23842169040299259242010-03-23T15:55:15.388-04:002010-03-23T15:55:15.388-04:00I found I can manage guilt by planning time. Frid...I found I can manage guilt by planning time. Friday nights are date night with my husband. That's his and we don't make other plans. Saturday we do family and household things, like shopping, cleaning, etc. and Sunday we have guests to keep up our friendships/ministry. I have a long commute with at least 45 minutes of uninterrupted time each way, so I write on the way to work and read on the way home, so I get both my "loves" in each day. I am accomplishing so much in that writing time, because I'll be thinking about what I want to write long before I do it. The time flies.Pia Thompsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09638789927330476915noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-65346529102619323072010-03-23T14:19:31.358-04:002010-03-23T14:19:31.358-04:00Great post. I did a similar one a while back for m...Great post. I did a similar one a while back for my blog - here <br />http://thewritecorner.wordpress.com/2010/03/09/freelance-writers-and-time-management/Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-18552121671382462522010-03-23T13:08:38.753-04:002010-03-23T13:08:38.753-04:00Wow. On one hand it's sad to see so much colle...Wow. On one hand it's sad to see so much collective guilt, but on the other, I'm glad to not be alone in my guilt! <br /><br />I think I agree w/Devon, though. Other professions put in long hours w/little compensation and usually don't face the sort of judgement we writers face because those professions are somehow respected more. <br /><br />The difference is that our long hours and vocational calling may never and most likely won't ever, pay off in the same volume of money as doctors and lawyers. So there's expectations that come into play. <br /><br />I continue to write because I simply can't stop. My youngest child is 13, so it's easier now. But I don't think my non-writing spouse will ever understand unless it pays off. Because to write, I do have to give up other domestic chores from time to time.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-44985000111106602032010-03-23T11:56:16.629-04:002010-03-23T11:56:16.629-04:00Wow Jody. Did you read my mind today? You must hav...Wow Jody. Did you read my mind today? You must have...along with the other 50+ commenters (so far) and countless readers of this post.<br /><br />Thanks for the encouragement and for the tips on making writing happen in the midst of hectic schedules.Brock Stephen Henninghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01590484534922863432noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-15285643728074121112010-03-23T10:45:11.926-04:002010-03-23T10:45:11.926-04:00I had much more difficulty writing after finding a...I had much more difficulty writing after finding an agent than I did before. It just took some adjusting.<br /><br />There can never be too many "how to find time to write" tips - I keep looking for the one that will work for me. :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-17112928676814483182010-03-23T10:29:45.172-04:002010-03-23T10:29:45.172-04:00Excellent advice. I can sum it up for me, live in...Excellent advice. I can sum it up for me, live intentionally. Do what you're doing.Mary Aalgaardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08051735579638637382noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-63897155705081082992010-03-23T07:18:58.341-04:002010-03-23T07:18:58.341-04:00Tons of guilt now--I have finally blocked off some...Tons of guilt now--I have finally blocked off some weekend hours and hope to do the same during the week but I feel badly doing it but I know I have to.Terri Tiffanyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07771622379178654235noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-64849761609681495122010-03-22T21:28:58.795-04:002010-03-22T21:28:58.795-04:00Like so much in life, it's a balance. Some da...Like so much in life, it's a balance. Some days the balance is way off, in one direction or the other. But generally if we can keep things on a relatively even keel, I think we're doing okay ;)Joannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03972054718663959694noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-84419556423010021692010-03-22T20:14:08.545-04:002010-03-22T20:14:08.545-04:00When I was still living at home my mum was a huge ...When I was still living at home my mum was a huge support and encouraged me with my writing. So much so that when I was playing games on my days off work I felt guilty for not writing. My dad didn't understand it so much. He kept trying to get me to become a journalist. At least I'd get paid writing. He didn't understand that wasn't the type of writing I was interested in. <br /><br />Now I've left home and am married to the most wonderful man. My husband supports me in my writing even though I haven't earned one cent from it as yet. (He is far more patient than I am). So again the guilt comes when I'm NOT writing. Ha.Lynda R Young as Elle Cardyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09975442291393246148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-70229169431437372142010-03-22T19:12:37.698-04:002010-03-22T19:12:37.698-04:00I do feel guilt from time to time... okay, a lot. ...I do feel guilt from time to time... okay, a lot. Usually it is deserved guilt though because I'm not managing my time right.<br /><br />You're right. being intentional about allocating time is SO helpful. I need to do a better job of that. I go through spurts where I'll do GREAT, then other spurts where I flounder. I'm thinking even published authors have that though.... I hope so anyway! It'd make me feel better!Krista Phillipshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10772828583379163612noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-68542362839405399062010-03-22T17:12:48.315-04:002010-03-22T17:12:48.315-04:00What an appropriate post today, Jody! Guilt is a h...What an appropriate post today, Jody! Guilt is a hard thing to shed! I've found that it's SO important for me to identify the things God wants me to do and let the other things go. I still struggle with finding the proper balance between writing, household responsibilities, church obligations, family time, etc., but it helps when I remind myself that I don't have to do it all - I just need to be sensitive to the tasks He has for me to do that day! One day at a time!! Great post! God bless!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11475395753533265087noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-34480230550698386512010-03-22T15:51:42.271-04:002010-03-22T15:51:42.271-04:00My critique partner and I were just discussing thi...My critique partner and I were just discussing this today!<br /><br />I loved reading through the comments and seeing how you all deal with this.<br /><br />I still struggle with it even now that my first book has been released.Lynnette Bonnerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14256307943304175911noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-79665666087188867312010-03-22T15:45:02.673-04:002010-03-22T15:45:02.673-04:00I've definitely carried around my share of wri...I've definitely carried around my share of writer's guilt. I'm always worried that I'm not managing my time well and I don't want to neglect my family. I try to balance my time, but sometimes, writing does take a great share of my time. But I'm lucky to have people around me that remind me to wake up/come out of the world of my novel and enjoy life outside of writing. To which I say, yup, I'm going to do just that!About Mehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10011023963327391019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-60241727420301426662010-03-22T15:14:23.204-04:002010-03-22T15:14:23.204-04:00I can definitely understand writer guilt, and I fi...I can definitely understand writer guilt, and I find it's a struggle every week. Thank you for your suggestions! I especially love the idea of scheduling family time like teas, etc.Erika Robuckhttp://www.erikarobuck.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-11326975019624679912010-03-22T15:07:40.500-04:002010-03-22T15:07:40.500-04:00I guess I should be grateful I don't have outs...I guess I should be grateful I don't have outside deadlines to meet just yet (only my own goals and deadlines). Your post is a good reminder for me to keep "balance" at the forefront - before I publish a novel (thinking positive here) and after.<br /><br />And, the best way I can maintain balance is to remind myself that God has a plan for me. I just have to take the action and leave him in charge of the results.Christi Craighttp://writingunderpressure.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-28401501008396162912010-03-22T15:07:26.868-04:002010-03-22T15:07:26.868-04:00It is different. It's like the guilt a person ...It is different. It's like the guilt a person who is on a diet feels when they splurge on cake and chocolate :)Jessica Bellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10889900730906728317noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-55744455043564732802010-03-22T15:07:15.671-04:002010-03-22T15:07:15.671-04:00You're right. As writers we all seem to experi...You're right. As writers we all seem to experience guilt, but I think rather than trying to shed it we need to recognize the focus of that guilt. If it's fear over not being able to succeed at everything maybe we have too high expectations of perfection for ourselves. If it's desperation over not getting everything done maybe we're trying to balance too many things.<br /><br />Evaluating what we're attempting to accomplish may reveal that this is the wrong time in our lives to be doing some of it. What are the highest priorities we have <i>right now</i>? What responsibilities could be put aside for a while or shifted to someone else without negative repercussions? <br /><br />Then realistic scheduling will help make time for important-to-us activities. In our daily schedules we know we need time for our writing. But we need time to "be still" with God, too, and we also need the rejuvenation of "me" time... however frivolous the chosen activity may seem.<br /><br />If we don't see the importance of setting aside specific time for what's really important I think we will always find ourselves scrambling, and that's a sure road to burn out. I know; I've been there.Carol J. Garvinhttp://careann.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-25486141093934695732010-03-22T15:04:11.600-04:002010-03-22T15:04:11.600-04:00Very true, Devon. Writers are definitely not the o...Very true, Devon. Writers are definitely not the only ones who have to try to juggle "life" and work.<br /><br />I would, however, have to add that I think writers, especially unpublished writers, struggle with a different kind of guilt (or at least I did). I'm spending enormous amounts of time and energy on my writing, without an equal monetary compensation that other professions like doctors and lawyers have. Just another thought. . .Jody Hedlundhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.com