tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post8749835734711467856..comments2024-03-28T13:35:16.194-04:00Comments on Author, Jody Hedlund: Sometimes People Just Don't UnderstandJody Hedlundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comBlogger74125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-7756094168042392872012-12-03T22:27:34.340-05:002012-12-03T22:27:34.340-05:00The few relatives who know about my writing don...The few relatives who know about my writing don't get it, and that's fine, but what does bother me sometimes is because the majority of blogging writers are parents, and no offense intended to Jody or any parents/writers I know, but a big misconception I feel people can make is that non-parents who don't have spouses have it so much easier. Well, some of us don't.<br /><br />I don't want to go into it here, but I urge all the over 30 adults to remember that it's taking LONGER for many of us to achieve a lot of the milestones you did, and in some respects it's HARDER, and those who say otherwise are either blind to that, or are lucky to have family and financial support many of us don't have, whatever the reason, and not necessarily through any fault of their own.<br /><br />I used to be afraid to mention my age to others because on average they'd be adults over 30, married with kids, or at least have kids if not married anymore, but sometimes I feel (GENERALLY) parents in particular have an unfair view of us under 30 adults who didn't follow the-<br /><br />"From High school/College/Worked 3 dead end jobs/married with kids/not married with kids/etc" path.<br /><br />Parents have it tough, but so do non-parents, like me, sometimes it's a trying experience just to care for YOURSELF. Period.Taurean Watkinshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16604609379930060667noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-60866107823061909872010-03-28T16:44:54.755-04:002010-03-28T16:44:54.755-04:00Ah, but your post hit home. The Kiddo once told me...Ah, but your post hit home. The Kiddo once told me that she wanted to write and sell some books so that, "You won't have to work so hard, Mommy, and you can play with me."<br /><br />Stab of guilt deep into my heart!Cynthia Reesehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13128418037470085123noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-15205376237566000902010-03-27T21:29:17.707-04:002010-03-27T21:29:17.707-04:00"Even worse is when a friend knows how excite..."Even worse is when a friend knows how excited we are about writing, but doesn’t ask us about it—as if it’s a taboo topic."<br /><br />Seriously! I have friends who do this exact thing and I don't understand it at all. It's a relief to see I'm not the only one going through it.Kirsten Leskohttp://disobedientwriter.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-22037890983823695712010-03-26T11:51:04.633-04:002010-03-26T11:51:04.633-04:00I hate that raised eyebrow or furrowed brow. The o...I hate that raised eyebrow or furrowed brow. The one that follows my answer to the question; "what do you do with your time?". <br />My response that I am a writer triggers that slow, eyebrow lift. It translates into..."Oh,you neglect your home and family...you sit all day".<br />Then you get the comments that you have mentioned, Jody.<br /><br />I am learning the way forward now. I smile, change the conversation to them. I have better things to do with my time than explain away my need to write. While they ramble on, I make mental notes about their character just in case I can use them in future projects. LOL<br />It must be difficult for a child to understand though.I do not have that problem. DH is happy that he is left to his hobbies, and my children are in two different countries.Glynis Peters https://www.blogger.com/profile/01175378917872403609noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-82022971353205974662010-03-26T11:15:48.158-04:002010-03-26T11:15:48.158-04:00I get, are you published yet? It's hard to ex...I get, are you published yet? It's hard to explain that for most, it's many years of hard work before some get the coveted publishing contract. Then it's many months of hard work after that.<br /><br />Virtually everyone says they want to write. Luckily (for us) they don't all do it!Theresa Milsteinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03477761307315565259noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-57122682965065181482010-03-26T09:36:33.593-04:002010-03-26T09:36:33.593-04:00Helping our children understand "why" is...Helping our children understand "why" is always a challenge, isn't it? I have recently had some wonderful times with my 15 year old daughter, dealing with many things of life including my battle with breast cancer. At one point of deep emotion, I told her, "God always knew you were going to be the daughter of a mother with breast cancer, and He will give you everything you need to walk that path."<br /><br />Knowing we are part of a bigger plan can help our children as well as us be encouraged! You children were given a mom who is a writer. They are blessed with that, and can be told the same!Catheyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00160601314555132897noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-63052683133078654742010-03-26T06:36:44.650-04:002010-03-26T06:36:44.650-04:00This post has me in tears at 6:30 AM--- because I ...This post has me in tears at 6:30 AM--- because I have a little girl who says the exact words of your little boy.<br /><br />I'm contracted with Zondervan for my first book... and yes, for me, staggering unmerited grace ... but for my sweet little girl?<br /><br />I pray everyday for grace to make the poiemas of these masterful children know that they are far more important to me than any blinking, waiting cursor....<br /><br />Thank you... for just speaking your story...<br /><br />All's grace,<br />AnnAnn Voskamp @Holy Experiencehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11742205499025104067noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-15946699758816013342010-03-25T22:08:21.182-04:002010-03-25T22:08:21.182-04:00Isn't it great to know how much your child(ren...Isn't it great to know how much your child(ren) loves you? Even though he expressed his sadness at the time your need to work, it has to touch you so deeply to know how important and loved you are. :) <br /><br />I find a large lack of understanding and attempts to "put yourself in someone else's shoes" when it comes to most everything in life. When you love something with a passion, and desperately want to share your love for that passion, it's not always easy to have someone stare at you blankly. In the end, I go back to why I do the things I do... the love & passion for it. They may not get it, but I don't get some of the things they do either.<br /><br />Great post Jody!CMOM Productionshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04595915747223847421noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-78617676895087060552010-03-25T21:51:31.662-04:002010-03-25T21:51:31.662-04:00Fabulous post! It's so true that people don...Fabulous post! It's so true that people don't get it at all. I do sometimes try to explain, but your idea of not doing that probably makes a whole lot more sense. Then I'll have a lot less glazed eyes staring back at me. ;-)Debra Lynn Sheltonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08238268767406623274noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-6306983221168837432010-03-25T21:48:13.467-04:002010-03-25T21:48:13.467-04:00I found your profile on another blog that I follow...I found your profile on another blog that I follow and added myself to follow you.<br /><br />If you would like to visit my blog you are more than welcome to.<br /><br />God bless you, Ron<br /><br />http://ronjoewhite.blogspot.comAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-45211997688233986972010-03-25T14:40:25.652-04:002010-03-25T14:40:25.652-04:00I am just starting out as a writer and am nowhere ...I am just starting out as a writer and am nowhere near getting published. That's probably why I don't bother telling most people I'm a writer. In fact, I have a hard time even calling myself a writer. Am I really a writer if I don't have any published works? I think most of my friends consider my writing a hobby. And maybe that's what it is right now. I just have to keep following my dream and hope that my "hobby" will soon turn into something more.Roller Coasterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15183668808628272381noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-17989612239475686122010-03-25T07:28:19.879-04:002010-03-25T07:28:19.879-04:00Jody, thank you so much for this wise and insightf...Jody, thank you so much for this wise and insightful post. I feel comforted every time I come to your blog and read your reassuring, reasonable words. I am NOWHERE near to getting published and already I've been getting some of what you described. It's either "Oh wow, you're going to be the next J.K. Rowling!" (yeah right, wishful thinking) or "What? You write? Shouldn't you be focusing on your day job?" I've been talking less and less about it as a result. I have learned to restrict any conversation about writing to people who get it, like my blogging friends.<br /><br />I have an award for you at my blog!! :)Julie Daohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13814052162359300933noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-91739640799002856132010-03-25T02:38:24.468-04:002010-03-25T02:38:24.468-04:00You are wise. And so far ahead in the game if you...You are wise. And so far ahead in the game if you realize that (as you state), you will probably misunderstand others at some point too.<br /><br />Great post. And I think that no matter what the profession, there will always be a lack of understanding involved with someone who isn't in it up to their armpits like the rest of us.*https://www.blogger.com/profile/06484208765656281917noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-73130961299667907972010-03-24T23:14:29.070-04:002010-03-24T23:14:29.070-04:00A long time ago I saw a poster promoting a book. I...A long time ago I saw a poster promoting a book. I can't even remember what the book was about but the poster remains with me. It was of a man in the snow pointing a gun at his old fashioned type-writer which he'd obviously thrown to the ground. This image spoke to me to loudly. Yes! I thought to myself. Yes! That's what it's sometimes like to write! It's frustrating, it's hard work and sometimes I just want to shoot my computer. And yet so many of my friends think I've chosen the "easy" lifestyle. Ha!Lynda R Young as Elle Cardyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09975442291393246148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-1314112005009829192010-03-24T21:45:12.381-04:002010-03-24T21:45:12.381-04:00Hi Jody & thanks for your response. :) I read ...Hi Jody & thanks for your response. :) I read all of your "guilt-related" posts & found them useful. <br /><br />I think you may be right about confidence and misunderstandings. I've always been overly-apologetic about everything, writing included, and I can see now how that might cast the impression that I'm not serious about learning the craft.<br /><br />Be well!Heather at My Coupon Coophttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14429799440079596667noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-59718751450731500562010-03-24T21:40:25.037-04:002010-03-24T21:40:25.037-04:00Writing is sooo awesome. YOU are a wonderful write...Writing is sooo awesome. YOU are a wonderful writer. And children always want our attention even when they are grown - in some way and then there are the grands. <br /><br />My point is that writers cannot stop -writing. Eventually even the children understand. :)T. Powell Coltrinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02160774009926623671noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-60520422178287893972010-03-24T20:24:37.900-04:002010-03-24T20:24:37.900-04:00Hi Jody -
I've run into people, who think wri...Hi Jody -<br /><br />I've run into people, who think writing a book is a piece of cake. They can't understand why I'm not published yet, and seem to lose interest when they learn I'm not. <br /><br />Let's face it, a non-writer isn't going to get excited over storylines, word choice, and writers conferences.<br /><br />My support comes mainly from my writer friends.<br /><br />Blessings,<br />Susan :)Susan J. Reinhardthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07461276857852409546noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-57499653823554775782010-03-24T19:25:28.287-04:002010-03-24T19:25:28.287-04:00I'm laughing right now, because I snuck away t...I'm laughing right now, because I snuck away to the library to read blogs! Boy, I was feeling cooped up. Does the guilt ever end? I don't think so!<br /><br />It's hard for little ones to understand, but as they grow older, they get it. <br /><br />Your children will brag about you someday!Jill Kemererhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07865493609868329393noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-29427645182744968852010-03-24T18:45:23.623-04:002010-03-24T18:45:23.623-04:00Zillions of times. Especially the "Where can ...Zillions of times. Especially the "Where can I buy your book," statement. LOL Oh well, I write because I love it--and the rest I try to let go of.Terri Tiffanyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07771622379178654235noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-20527646069599746172010-03-24T18:29:11.845-04:002010-03-24T18:29:11.845-04:00Hi Heather!
Oh, there's definitely guilt too, ...Hi Heather!<br />Oh, there's definitely guilt too, isn't there? You'll have to take a look at my last post "Dealing With Writer's Guilt." I think misunderstanding and guilt walk hand in hand.<br /><br />And that's a great question. Maybe sometimes we are projecting. Maybe if we talked about our writing with more confidence, we'd experience less misunderstanding.Jody Hedlundhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-88498103579847934352010-03-24T18:24:06.330-04:002010-03-24T18:24:06.330-04:00Jody, I am not even close to being published, but ...Jody, I am not even close to being published, but I can totally relate to everything you said.<br /><br />Another thing: How about the self-imposed guilt? <br /><br />Oops, one more: Do other people really see our writing as selfish and indulgent, or am I projecting?<br /><br />Congratulations on your success!Heather at My Coupon Coophttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14429799440079596667noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-38462372511024189142010-03-24T16:55:50.409-04:002010-03-24T16:55:50.409-04:00Whoops. Pardon the dangling thought, there at the ...Whoops. Pardon the dangling thought, there at the end.jjdebenedictishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16950592240599703771noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-70402086573049553132010-03-24T16:54:41.783-04:002010-03-24T16:54:41.783-04:00My husband is a theoretical physicist. He models b...My husband is a theoretical physicist. He models black holes and space-time.<br /><br />And he <i>won't</i> talk about his work to people. He very politely evades or deflects their questions. <br /><br />Part of it is because he's met too many physicists who won't shut up about their work, but a larger part is he can't have a meaningful discussion about it with anyone who isn't in the same field. With most people, he's stuck answering very child-like questions.<br /><br />Which sounds exactly like what you're describing. Most people don't understand, and thus you end up clearing up misconceptions rather than having a meaningful discussion.<br /><br />So havingjjdebenedictishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16950592240599703771noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-22094219961644816612010-03-24T16:25:15.693-04:002010-03-24T16:25:15.693-04:00Oh have I felt this guilt. In fact, as I type rig...Oh have I felt this guilt. In fact, as I type right now I'm waiting to leave to go to the pediatrician w/ a kid who probably has conjunctivitis. Luckily she sort of gets the book thing. sort of.<br /><br />I am fortunate in that I have had a number of freelance projects. It's not quite the same as having my novel (aka my baby) published. But it's almost as good - my name on the cover and all. But people will ask me how it's selling, or how great are the royalties. And I have to explain that, uh, no, there are no royalties...and I don't know how well it's selling...<br />Thanks for this post, Jody. And congrats on the book deal!Kristine Asselinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18257286523945921891noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-14982718127246043392010-03-24T15:45:08.877-04:002010-03-24T15:45:08.877-04:00Absolutely. And it is sad when my kid says I can b...Absolutely. And it is sad when my kid says I can bring my computer up to the bathroom with me so I can sit with her while she takes a bath. So I'm really trying not to be on the computer so much when she's awake. <br /><br />I like how you said you will probably misunderstand others at some point. That is so true. And it's not because we're bad people or have bad intentions. It's just human nature.<br /><br />And so I keep plugging away, realizing that I need to project positivity into the public places.Elana Johnsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05877856005992028912noreply@blogger.com