tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post7519094607533723070..comments2024-03-28T03:02:16.508-04:00Comments on Author, Jody Hedlund: Should Writers Complain Publicly About Hardships?Jody Hedlundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comBlogger67125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-48426665041952635342016-05-11T10:27:07.269-04:002016-05-11T10:27:07.269-04:00Jody, I notice that this conversation took place i...Jody, I notice that this conversation took place in 2011. At the time, I'd had 3 novels published and was learning (the hard way) about the "secret" problems published authors have. Now I confine my complaints primarily to private loops for authors, because I've learned that the average reader feels the way about us that I do about professional baseball players. But I still get tired of reading the bright, happy posts of many of my fellow authors. Thanks for the conversation<br />Richard Mabryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15993592219849830777noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-10454875279747180422011-01-14T05:10:48.769-05:002011-01-14T05:10:48.769-05:00Hello Jody! Although I am commenting for the first...Hello Jody! Although I am commenting for the first time, I've been a long time reader and I am amazed at the quantity of discussions and subjects that have been approached in your blog. This is a very good post as well.<br /><br />I think this can apply to every single blogger too and not only published authors. A personal blog does allow all liberty to vent, if we choose to do so - it is the writer's right to share what he or she wishes. However, the author has to be conscientious that such "venting" will be read by everyone who comes across their page and may set the mood for the blog and the authors themselves.<br /><br />You have compared the rantings of a published writer being read by unpublished authors to the problems of mothers being heard by childless/unfertile women. One can broaden that comparison and say that it is similar to someone who is complaining about how the food is not to their liking, or the television suddenly has a bad image, or how you have a flu and it is making you sneeze and cough all the time; there will always be someone who has little if anything to eat, no television and with a disease worse than a flu. The point is, no matter what complains you may have, there will always be someone who has it a lot worse, and someone who has it a lot better (one of the things that make us feel like venting has to do with this second group, I think). <br /><br />In conclusion, when one is complaining about something there will be those who emphatize and those which said complains are beyond their own situation (they wish they could have those complains!). So I agree with all your ideas and I'd like to add that readers become more empathetic towards ranting published authors when they are pontual, scarce complains, well-backed by good arguments and with an educational purpose. It should also end in a note of positivity or humour, if possible! :)<br /><br />Thank you for this post!Susanahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14116633223920844460noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-88949693896290876982011-01-13T22:59:43.386-05:002011-01-13T22:59:43.386-05:00Hi Jody -
There's a difference between sharin...Hi Jody -<br /><br />There's a difference between sharing the process with all its ups and downs and whining. Whether we're talking about writing or difficult personal situations, our attitude comes through.<br /><br />You're an inspiration to me. Thank you for sharing the good, the bad, and the "you've got to be kidding" moments of a published author.<br /><br />Blessings,<br />Susan :)Susan J. Reinhardthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07461276857852409546noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-27470716983631869352011-01-13T21:53:59.927-05:002011-01-13T21:53:59.927-05:00As a writer I reserve the right to describe whatev...As a writer I reserve the right to describe whatever I am going through and if I feel the need to vent I will. I feel other writers should too.<br /><br />As you state, you are sharing your experience so others can learn and be inspired so if someone doesn't want to hear that then she is not the intended audience. <br /><br />It's all about the audience. People can always go somewhere else and read about other things.Bakari Akil II, Ph.D.https://www.blogger.com/profile/07048932880107339712noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-50770358507640931052011-01-13T13:09:41.566-05:002011-01-13T13:09:41.566-05:00I like when people talk about their hardships as l...I like when people talk about their hardships as long as it's in a balanced way, and not just lots of self-pity: they recognize how well they're doing overall, but also admit when they're having a hard time.<br /><br />Personally, I find it encouraging that other people struggle with writing and publishing as well, and it makes me more thankful for where I am right now because at every step there's positive as well as negative aspects.<br /><br />Great blog!Plamena Schmidthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14222695582552877560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-43356097906739174002011-01-13T12:33:09.816-05:002011-01-13T12:33:09.816-05:00Your blog has been a huge help to me as you have t...Your blog has been a huge help to me as you have trailblazed the way through debut authorship. As I've said before, it has been very comforting to me as I have gone through a few of the same things six months later. I can remind myself: "Hey, this is normal. Jody felt the same way."Rosslyn Elliotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11304732306399786236noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-70635340213104855622011-01-13T00:29:03.396-05:002011-01-13T00:29:03.396-05:00I appreciate authors who give a balanced picture o...I appreciate authors who give a balanced picture of life post contract but do so without falling prey to complaining. Those, like you, Jody, who share their challenges and struggles in an effort to educate and enlighten are performing a service for those who have yet to sell a book.<br /><br />If published authors painted a Pollyannic view of their lives, they could be seen as misleading others. I think you're an excellent example of a blogger who presents a well rounded view of life as a published author on your blog and social networking sites.Keli Gwynhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13236868298400593688noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-75200417441518349582011-01-12T20:34:11.510-05:002011-01-12T20:34:11.510-05:00Hey Debbie! Just wanted you to know that even if y...Hey Debbie! Just wanted you to know that even if you leave comment number 1001, I still read each and every one! I love the discussion on this blog, and even if I can't jump into the comments as much as I'd like, I really do read each of them! :-)Jody Hedlundhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-85357483054418104322011-01-12T20:32:41.225-05:002011-01-12T20:32:41.225-05:00I think it's important to see both sides of th...I think it's important to see both sides of the coin. In one sense the unpubbed writer longs, and the pubbed writer langishes. Both are realities. This is a journey that never stops being an uphill climb, with everything in this life I should expect some trials, and be grateful God always provides a soft place to fall. <br /><br />Thank you for your transparency Jody:)Tamika:https://www.blogger.com/profile/04874834971492028558noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-75240058021679195952011-01-12T20:13:37.072-05:002011-01-12T20:13:37.072-05:00There are people with whom I'm willing to shar...There are people with whom I'm willing to share anything with about writing. Then there are things I want to keep between close friends. This repeats Richard Mabry's point from above, but it is true.Walt Mussellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07252729944233200374noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-39231257646140303762011-01-12T19:25:54.265-05:002011-01-12T19:25:54.265-05:00This is comment #57, so you probably won't eve...This is comment #57, so you probably won't even see this, but here's my 2 cents anyway....funny I should read this today after receiving not one but TWO rejections! Sometimes I wonder if I'm just going to be a blogger all my life when I'd really love to add the phrase "published author" behind my name. Just part of the process, I suppose.<br />Thanks for your wonderful post :)Debbie Dillonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06542211096013253656noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-22499536392190292842011-01-12T18:36:52.924-05:002011-01-12T18:36:52.924-05:00I was overwhelmed trying to read all the comments,...I was overwhelmed trying to read all the comments, so I apologize if I'm just repeating someone else here, but everything in life is relative. I've always known this, but in the past few days, I've come to realize just how true it is..<br /><br />I have a contract waiting to be signed, so technically, with a simple signature and a stamp, I could say I'm a published author ... my book's just not out yet.<br /><br />The thing is, there are also other possibilities. And I have to make this huge decision and not make too many people wait or feel I'm not serious, etc...<br />I'm afraid of coming across as a *problem author* before everything begins.<br />But then again, I know it's completely normal to take at least a week and to contact others with your full ms and make sure you're making the right decision. <br />Plus, all these people made me wait for months ... they can wait weeks, right? ;) lol<br /><br />My point here is, this is a position I've dreamt about many times, thinking about how great it would be when, really, it's just as stressful as querying and waiting for responses ... it's just a different position. But no less nerve-wracking.<br /><br />So, I think published authors <b>do</b> have the right to complain. Your blog is about your journey ... why should you have to hold things in? Besides, people need to see all sides of this business. No one wants to read blog after blog about querying/submitting and not learn anything about what it's like after that process works and an author becomes published.<br /><br />I guess the key is to make sure you show recognition of your position and that you appreciate it, even though you may have problems, so as not to hurt the feelings of those who are still struggling.eden tylerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17599335588966259388noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-32118444160168960962011-01-12T17:55:51.045-05:002011-01-12T17:55:51.045-05:00I like hearing the ups and downs of a writer's...I like hearing the ups and downs of a writer's life. It helps me know that everyone goes through difficult times and that I am normal! ;)Sherrinda Ketchersidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07581676437345249386noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-44192626900932004052011-01-12T16:56:50.698-05:002011-01-12T16:56:50.698-05:00Here's my opinion on it:
Very few people like...Here's my opinion on it:<br /><br />Very few people like to hear other people complain. It gets old very quickly. So while people like "real" and "transparent" they don't usually like "complaining" or "whiny."<br /><br />To temper this I'd say:<br />1. Not every problem has to be aired (even to your close friends.) No, I'm not saying swallow everything and keep it down, but sometimes just forgiving (if you've been wronged) and moving on can be a better option than venting.<br />2. Have a few close people when you do need to vent. Not everything has to be public. (Of course your post covered this one well already.)<br />3. Sometimes wait until it's over. I'm betting some of your transparent posts came off as transparent instead of complaining because you waited until something good had come from it, until it was over and you'd learned from it or moved on, or something to that effect. I think very few (if any) good things come from us reacting in anger instead of handling the situation more calmly.<br />And 4. Use discretion on when, how and how much you do post negative things publicly.Wendy Delfossehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16614782334273299261noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-33589232380060256602011-01-12T16:10:27.505-05:002011-01-12T16:10:27.505-05:00Because you have been so transparent about the pub...Because you have been so transparent about the publication process, I've appreciated your journey, and the journey of other writers, so much more. I value this transparency because it forewarns me of what is to come. There's plenty of material on the standard struggles of writers but so little on what happens once someone gets published. Your thoughtful list/suggestions on the matter is great too.<br />Thank you.Lynda R Young as Elle Cardyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09975442291393246148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-31319655075366546712011-01-12T15:31:08.421-05:002011-01-12T15:31:08.421-05:00I remember a radio announcer (Rex Murphy, CBC) say...I remember a radio announcer (Rex Murphy, CBC) saying that if you were born in a first world nation, you've already won the most important lottery there is.<br /><br />Most of us are fortunate enough to only have "first world" problems to deal with, like getting fifty rejection letters rather than getting cholera. <br /><br />It isn't that we have no right to ever complain--it's that we should remember to be thankful more often.jjdebenedictishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16950592240599703771noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-16751894926956199062011-01-12T15:20:12.359-05:002011-01-12T15:20:12.359-05:00Yes, I've heard it before and it wasn't yo...Yes, I've heard it before and it wasn't you (I promise). Great analogy between the barren woman and her friends. I had an English teacher once say, "a problems a problem no matter how big." I loved how that validated concerns we might have that others would scoff at. BTW, I'm great at listening to rants. Anytime.Tanahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10518718614911804428noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-58715187869410347352011-01-12T15:18:49.310-05:002011-01-12T15:18:49.310-05:00The only 'problem' I have with complaining...The only 'problem' I have with complaining is that it's negative. That doesn't mean it needs to be removed - it just means it needs to be handled gently and mixed with a good dose of optimism (not necessarily in the same post).<br /><br />As for published authors complaining...goodness, *everyone* has something going wrong! Even Bill Gates does, I'm sure! So it never gets me down. If anything, it even strengthens my resolve to be a published author, because I have to ask myself, "Do I really want this?" And I always answer, "Yes."Melodyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08846251713093236356noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-85928090529390046332011-01-12T15:15:14.026-05:002011-01-12T15:15:14.026-05:00I think there will always be difficult times, no m...I think there will always be difficult times, no matter where we are in life. No situation is ever going to be perfect, even if it is everything we want it to be.<br /><br />I think there is a balance between honestly expressing our feelings and unprofessionally complaining about them. The trick is to find that balance.Karen M. Petersonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06972093977468313631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-30934663442126265152011-01-12T15:07:50.736-05:002011-01-12T15:07:50.736-05:00There's a difference between complaining and s...There's a difference between complaining and sharing your reality. Complainers whine and vent, with no eye to solution or change. When you share, you open yourself up to dialogue and you posit possible solutions of your own. You, my dear, are solidly in the latter group.<br /><br />Continue to share from your experience. I believe so many of us are learning from your experiences. Shrug off the "haters". People who tell you to stop complaining because they wish they were where you are, are people who are likely to get there...and complain.PatriciaWhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04572087157439187319noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-82767467071414927702011-01-12T15:02:47.213-05:002011-01-12T15:02:47.213-05:00Knowledge is power. I want to know the pitfalls as...Knowledge is power. I want to know the pitfalls as well as the successes. As long as there is balance and not chronic, habitual complaining, I am grateful of the published authors who paint a realistic picture. Networking with other pubbed authors allows for a more understanding audience, of course, but those of us who seriously aspire for publication should keep our mouths shut and our ears open. It's difficult to learn from those who share their experiences when all you hear is the roar of your own voice.Debra Sandershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02487022995861887640noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-9258350010486497422011-01-12T14:58:38.070-05:002011-01-12T14:58:38.070-05:00It can go both ways. Natalie Whipple put up a post...It can go both ways. Natalie Whipple put up a post awhile ago about unpublished writers telling published writers, "Well, AT LEAST you've got an agent, etc." That can get annoying, too, because just because you're published doesn't mean it's all sunshine and rainbows. Hardships continue, and past successes don't make up for current hardships.<br /><br />I think this depends on each author individually how they deal with talking about their hardships. Whining isn't appropriate in any circumstance, published or unpublished, in my opinion. However, talking about what we got through is helpful to everyone. Just do it in a positive light. :)<br /><br />Really great post, Jody!Michelle D. Argylehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09696465137285587646noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-29240764716851531752011-01-12T14:19:57.960-05:002011-01-12T14:19:57.960-05:00I can understand why unpublished writers would be ...I can understand why unpublished writers would be frustrated, but by the same logic, everyone who has a job should stop complaining because there are so many unemployed people who'd love to have their job.<br /><br />I don't mind authors sharing their frustrations. As an unpubbed writer, I want a realistic idea of what I'm getting into - not a dream vision. But, as a reader, if someone complains a lot, they start to sound bitter and negative, and I'll be less likely to buy their book.Katrinahttp://readericreatedhim.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-61089082396360387022011-01-12T14:19:12.076-05:002011-01-12T14:19:12.076-05:00I can understand why unpublished writers would be ...I can understand why unpublished writers would be frustrated, but by the same logic, <i>everyone</i> who has a job should stop complaining because there are so many unemployed people who'd love to have their job.<br /><br />I don't mind authors sharing their frustrations. As an unpubbed writer, I want a realistic idea of what I'm getting into - not a dream vision. But, as a reader, if someone complains a lot, they start to sound bitter and negative, and I'll be less likely to buy their book.Knoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-60741133766973150262011-01-12T14:15:19.503-05:002011-01-12T14:15:19.503-05:00I know from other published writers, that even onc...I know from other published writers, that even once agented, there are many bumps along the way. The most frequent seems to be dropped by the publisher after two books. <br /><br />Anyway, it'd be interesting to hear about these tribulations after publication, so the rest of us can be prepared for what might happen.M Paxhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14096697282530998519noreply@blogger.com