tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post7221386278478813690..comments2024-03-28T13:35:16.194-04:00Comments on Author, Jody Hedlund: How I Do It: Ask For HelpJody Hedlundhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comBlogger27125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-51221175673131227002011-08-29T15:11:40.936-04:002011-08-29T15:11:40.936-04:00Love this whole series! With the move I have been ...Love this whole series! With the move I have been a little crazy, but I know now I have to ask and accept help. My sister has me penciled in several times a week to watch my kids so I can write. And my husband and I are trying to figure out ways to help each other more. Now, I just need to find a supportive homeschooling and writing group and I'll feel back on track! Thanks for all the tips:)Karahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03925811510913201292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-43241308258764060272011-08-28T12:37:22.223-04:002011-08-28T12:37:22.223-04:00We moms are good at a lot of things, but most of u...We moms are good at a lot of things, but most of us are not so good as asking for help. But it's SO necessary. <br /><br />Great post for writer moms and any kind of moms! I'll be sending some of my reader moms around to see this one!Laura@OutnumberedMomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10764574855540659528noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-69791048419293205142011-08-27T22:53:27.431-04:002011-08-27T22:53:27.431-04:00Hi Jody -
Thanks for sharing your "secrets.&...Hi Jody -<br /><br />Thanks for sharing your "secrets."<br /><br />The dynamics of my life were different but still required asking for help. Like you, I found people willing and able when they became aware of the need.<br /><br />Blessings,<br />Susan :)Susan J. Reinhardthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07461276857852409546noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-13487794247800554612011-08-27T09:43:20.242-04:002011-08-27T09:43:20.242-04:00I enjoy stopping by to see what you are doing next...I enjoy stopping by to see what you are doing next. <br /><br />Jody thanks for the information and encouragement you give to other writers!MLhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01672068349338809249noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-71634586963449811842011-08-27T06:25:16.839-04:002011-08-27T06:25:16.839-04:00Lucille, must have been the topic of the day! :-)Lucille, must have been the topic of the day! :-)Jody Hedlundhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-61392422308277362022011-08-26T21:40:53.295-04:002011-08-26T21:40:53.295-04:00Isn't that weird...I wrote a similar post: htt...Isn't that weird...I wrote a similar post: http://blog.rumorsofglory.com/2011/08/26/how-to-ask-for-help/Lucille Zimmermanhttp://blog.rumorsofglory.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-41489894720248641262011-08-26T16:58:20.948-04:002011-08-26T16:58:20.948-04:00Yes, I've learned to ask for help. Sometimes i...Yes, I've learned to ask for help. Sometimes it's asking other writers for help whey a scene has my stymied. I've also learned my husband is a great brainstormer too.<br />Sometimes it's asking others to forgive me when I have to say no. Their understanding is a tremendous help to me as a whittle down my responsibilities so I can focus on writing and editing.<br />I've asked my 10 y.o. daughter if she'd liked to be my assistant. She said yes (for pay, of course.) The first thing I'm going to teach her? Filing!Beth K. Vogthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04032849469366266791noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-89074003923344594422011-08-26T16:46:17.676-04:002011-08-26T16:46:17.676-04:00Great points, Jody - if we don't ask, how will...Great points, Jody - if we don't ask, how will anyone know we need it? Why isbit SOOOO hard for us to ask for and then accept help? I know, that's a whole other blogpost!!Kristina Knighthttp://kristinaknightauthor.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-17963882330924187082011-08-26T14:33:17.916-04:002011-08-26T14:33:17.916-04:00Beautifully said. We all need help sometimes and y...Beautifully said. We all need help sometimes and you're right, we shouldn't be afraid or ashamed to ask. As long as we are willing to give as well as receive, that's what matters. Besides, that's what friends and family are for. :)Heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05130733681254163610noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-43635314786333421732011-08-26T13:05:07.376-04:002011-08-26T13:05:07.376-04:00I agree that we need support if we are going to su...I agree that we need support if we are going to succeed. We instilled this in our kids as they were growing up. I love when they help one another, us, and others. You have to have teamwork to have success.<br /><br />When I was younger and the kids were little, I didn't ask for help, and now I wish I did. I was always burning both ends of the candle. You got to be humble and ask for help if you need it.<br /><br />Great post.Loree Huebnerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09845600356878587780noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-25803712198424038532011-08-26T12:33:43.821-04:002011-08-26T12:33:43.821-04:00Found this post via twitter, and am so glad I did....Found this post via twitter, and am so glad I did. I need to ask help with a few things and I've been putting that off.Camuesquehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10411940091646536558noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-11417086165723482152011-08-26T11:23:33.758-04:002011-08-26T11:23:33.758-04:00I'm in the same situation (oh, except for the ...I'm in the same situation (oh, except for the professional publishing part!). I, too, try to run a household, home-school four children, and write books. I also work one day a week, on Saturday. My husband is supportive and, believe it or not, my children can do chores! I've had mixed help from other home-school moms. Many of the ultra-conservative moms don't believe a woman should have a career and judge me for trying. The other, more libertarian types are as good as gold. I don't ask much of them, though, because they're as busy as I am!Jillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05536293384635588296noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-55752022268979305782011-08-26T11:20:20.526-04:002011-08-26T11:20:20.526-04:00Jody, you nailed it when you said others wont know...Jody, you nailed it when you said others wont know we need help unless we ask! We can spin ourselves into frustration by trying to do it all - but that hurts everyone. Asking for help opens up so many doors. I am lucky to have a supportive husband too. Thanks fore reminding us that we all have the same issues as writers with families and other jobs - whether we are aspiring authors or with many bestsellers!donna galantihttp://www.donnagalanti.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-83818950877977587832011-08-26T10:54:58.232-04:002011-08-26T10:54:58.232-04:00Hear hear. We all need help sometimes. My wife can...Hear hear. We all need help sometimes. My wife can only walk with crutches and has to use a wheelchair to go around outside the house, so I end up doing a lot to help her out. I do often feel guilty about needing time to write, but then she's so supportive of me that she feels guilty if she ever needs to interrupt me for some help. <br /><br />I'm glad to help her, though. It's just funny that we both feel bad for accepting each other's support!Paul Anthony Shortthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14393249001158230985noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-62071847658014013392011-08-26T10:35:15.981-04:002011-08-26T10:35:15.981-04:00Jody, I am just in awe of all you do, especially w...Jody, I am just in awe of all you do, especially with homeschooling your kids, too. Whenever I get overwhelmed, I think, "My kids will be in school in a few years and then I'll have more time during the day." Probably a terrible thing to admit...But then I think of you teaching your kids and squeezing writing in between it all...Wow!<br /><br />I needed this post today, for sure. I'm in a position where I've needed to ask for help more than usual lately, and it always feels a little awkward or like I'm being clingy. Thankfully my husband is "Super Dad" and pitches in however he can. :)<br /><br />Have a great weekend!Sarah Forgravehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09101753891967001104noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-52737172735176076332011-08-26T10:35:01.574-04:002011-08-26T10:35:01.574-04:00Thanks for sharing your tips! My husband does most...Thanks for sharing your tips! My husband does most of the cooking (he enjoys it) and helps me with the house work when I need it. I try to write while my sons are at school, but their health ailments take a good chunk of my time. <br /><br />Sometimes I need my friends to watch one of my sons if the other is seeing a doctor.Jennifer McFaddenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01636967529036754988noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-29405604750884367692011-08-26T10:16:43.916-04:002011-08-26T10:16:43.916-04:00Jill brings up a good point. We often feel guilty ...Jill brings up a good point. We often feel guilty before publication (before we're earning an income) for spending time on our writing and asking our family for help. But I think the earlier we can establish those boundaries the better. Because honestly, for most of us, writing is something that's important to us whether we ever earn a dime or not. And if something is important to us, our family should respect that. :-)Jody Hedlundhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12424307540530719614noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-65858443562637700602011-08-26T09:54:55.160-04:002011-08-26T09:54:55.160-04:00Jody, I'm still working on enlisting my kids h...Jody, I'm still working on enlisting my kids help. They're fighting it like it's the plague!Eileen Astels Watsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11098531184044931737noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-48964850864014128272011-08-26T09:40:27.269-04:002011-08-26T09:40:27.269-04:00I admit, I am a bit of a control freak, and that c...I admit, I am a bit of a control freak, and that combined with a martyr-complex is a deadly combination. But in the last several months I've handed over meal prep to my husband -- he loves to cook, is way better at it than I am, and everyone is happy! Now I'm off the fold 4 loads of laundry!Michelle DeRushahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07658349105535790020noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-4120586077632987882011-08-26T09:37:36.001-04:002011-08-26T09:37:36.001-04:00I was a stay-at-home mom who did it all for years,...I was a stay-at-home mom who did it all for years, so transitioning to a work-at-home mom as a writer was challenging for me. I've gotten much better about asking for help and expecting my kids to pitch in, but I know I still take on too much! I think part of it is that I treat my writing as a full-time job, but when you aren't getting paid for something, it isn't as "real" as a normal job. Or maybe I'm just crazy!Jill Kemererhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07865493609868329393noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-7249918680456576752011-08-26T09:25:55.257-04:002011-08-26T09:25:55.257-04:00All very good advice.
BTW - just finished The Pre...All very good advice.<br /><br />BTW - just finished The Preacher's Bride. Brava. Loved the way you built sexual tension between them before there was even so much as a touch and then made casual, asexual physical contact so sensual without getting raunchy. All that takes a very talented touch.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-65819748690536336902011-08-26T08:57:03.617-04:002011-08-26T08:57:03.617-04:00I have learned the hard way to ask for help. Even...I have learned the hard way to ask for help. Even when I was a stay at home mom I would have a eager teenager from the church help me during those crazy hours when I'm trying to get dinner ready and make myself look presentable for my hubby's arrival after a long day.<br />I also have help with cleaning the house. I don't feel guilty anymore about these little "pleasures" in my home. The nanny (now that I'm back to work full time) and the housecleaner allow me more precious time to spend with my kids. Thankfully I also have a compulsive hubby who views cleaning as "relaxing". I feel blessed in this area!Roslyn Ricehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13577337176258115982noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-26421138315250408332011-08-26T08:53:10.367-04:002011-08-26T08:53:10.367-04:00Oh how much I love this! Asking for help is SO SO ...Oh how much I love this! Asking for help is SO SO SO hard for me, but I finally realized sometime this past year that I HAVE to. It is still a struggle and a very humbling experience, but I force myself on occasion!<br /><br />In the process of trying to "teach" my kiddos how to help more. They've had a year of having Grandma here to do EVERYTHING for them, so it is not a simple thing to reteach. One step at a time though!Krista Phillipshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10772828583379163612noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-13385657159696982932011-08-26T08:19:40.710-04:002011-08-26T08:19:40.710-04:00My husband and I had a long conversation last wint...My husband and I had a long conversation last winter about how much time I was putting into my writing. A few hours later,he offered to cook dinners for me (when his schedule allows it, which is most of the time). This has been a huge help, and I wish I would have asked sooner. He also watches the kids on Saturday so I can go elsewhere and write. I feel like he's the one who deserves to get published and be paid for all his hard work of supporting me.<br /><br />He's wonderful, my husband. Just in case you didn't figure that out from the above comments. :-)Naomi Rawlingshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02431203734855694561noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8539581256374625880.post-8889529114588123492011-08-26T06:59:50.433-04:002011-08-26T06:59:50.433-04:00Jody this reminds me of something my Sunday School...Jody this reminds me of something my Sunday School teacher says frequently as we talk about how to make "the church" more real and effective in the community. We all have a calling or ministry or job given to us by God. I may not feel called to the same ministry as you but as your friend and sister in Christ, I can find many ways to support you. I think this is what you're talking about. My husband doesn't necessarily want to be an active part of my non-profit nor does he want to edit/polish my books. He DOES post comments about my blog on Facebook, and he DOES cook, start laundry and...the dreaded and much hated emptying of the dishwasher. He's a wonderful support, and so are my parents. I was completely surprised at their excitement when I told them I was writing a book! We are our own worst enemies sometimes, aren't we? Great post. It's so true that people often don't help or support because they don't know what to do. All we need to do is tell them what we need. Isn't it funny that sometimes writers can be the worst communicators? Well maybe not funny...Sherrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03853454451176677940noreply@blogger.com