Do You Have What It Takes to Make the Long Haul?

**Due to Memorial Day I won't be posting on Monday. Have a great holiday weekend! See you Wednesday!

This week I finished writing my second contracted novel. I don’t have a firm title for it, so most of the time I call it Book #2. It’s the second book in my three book contract, but in the long line of books I’ve written it’s more like the eighth. It’s a whopping total of 95,000 words, 26 chapters plus an afterward.

Those who follow me on Twitter know I’ve pushed myself this past month to write 1000 words a day (with the exclusion of Sundays). And I’m happy to report I made that goal. For the month of May, I wrote 1000 or more words every day, except one day when I squeaked by with 400.

When I started writing Book #2 January 1, I originally gave myself the goal of 800 words a day. There were days I did more and many I did less. The important thing is that I made myself sit down every day and at least try—through sicknesses, busy kid activities, and countless distractions.

I logged a running total of my daily word count in the back of my plot notebook and that helped keep me on track. But what motivated me even more this past month was having accountability. A few writing friends—Natalie Bahm, Paul Greci, and Heather Sunseri—checked in with me on Twitter and spurred me to finish strong. Thanks, guys!

Knowing we have to report our progress to someone else can be a huge motivator in the daily struggle to meet our writing goals. Most of us are solitary workers, so it’s easy to slip into the habit of being sloppy. But when we have someone (or all of Twitterverse) watching what we’re doing, we’re more apt to discipline ourselves. No one likes to confess to failure.

I have to admit, now that I’m done with Book #2, I’ve had a case of jitters. I can’t help thinking, “Did I tell the story the best I could?” or “Will my editors like what I’ve come up with?” Of course they already gave their approval to my synopsis for Book # 2 before I started writing it. And in the meantime I’ve had the opportunity to talk through plot issues with them. I’m not stabbing in the dark, hoping I got the right story idea. But, even so, I’m plagued with self-doubt.

I just spent every spare minute over the past months writing Book #2. Now I’m facing attacks of insecurity, weeks of self-editing, then the pins-and-needle wait for my in-house editors to read it and give me their thoughts. After that they’ll compile mountainous rewrites, probably around the time I’ll need to vamp up marketing efforts on The Preacher’s Bride and start research on Book #3.

Some days when I think about the weight of all the responsibility and pressure, I wonder, “Am I nuts? What am I doing this for?” What’s the real reason any of us write—especially considering all the obstacles and headaches before AND after publication?

It’s certainly not for the glamour. Or the money. Or the fame. Because we all know how little of each there is.

There are a lot of people who write books and pursue publication. But what I’m discovering is that those who stick with it through the ups and downs usually have two qualities:

1. Passion: An inner burning need to tell a story. They delight in bringing stories to life and would love doing it even if publication ceased to exist.

2. Drive: The discipline to keep writing day after day, the determination to learn and grow, and the stamina to stand up against the hardships.

Passion and Drive. Maybe these aren’t the top qualities for every writer who sticks with writing for the long haul, but they’re certainly two that help define me.

What about you? Are you writing and pursuing publication for the long haul? What do you think are the top qualities of those who stick it out?

What to Do With Positive & Negative Feedback

What we do with the feedback we receive is more critical than we realize. Often we hear statements like, “Weigh it all, but ultimately make the changes you think are necessary” or “Feedback is subjective so don’t rush to change anything.”

There are truths to these kinds of statements. But I think too often writers use them as an excuse to take the sting out of tough criticism. We want to find some way to make ourselves feel better and so we brush aside the especially hard comments, categorizing them as someone else’s “take-it-or-leave opinion.”

If we classify feedback as “subjective” then that often lets us off the hook from having to make significant changes. After all, we’ve spent months working on our book. Who else could possibly know the masterpiece better than the artist herself?

With the plethora of feedback we’re sure to receive over the course of our writing careers, how can we get a grip on handling feedback in a way that will help us the most?

At this point in my writing career, here’s my approach: The unpleasant constructive criticism is like broccoli—I swallow and digest it, knowing the leafy florets will nurture me and make me stronger. The pleasant affirming feedback is like bubble gum—I chew it, enjoy the flavor, but eventually spit it out, knowing too much can rot my teeth.

Broccoli: The unpleasant constructive criticism

I’m not talking about mean-spirited, lambasting, you-stink kind of criticism. No one ever deserves rotting food. Constructive criticism, however, can and will often hurt and may even bring us to tears.

When I got my substantive edits on The Preacher’s Bride, initially I fell into despair, shed a few tears, and basically had a pity party for myself. I could have ranted and raged about how unfair it was to have to make so many changes. Some of the changes were in fact “subjective,” things Bethany House wanted me to adjust to meet the needs of their faithful readers.

Instead of tossing aside the feedback, I mulled it over, digested every comment, and tried to find the value behind every suggestion. Someone, somewhere had a good reason for each one, and I tried to understand what they saw. In other words, I made myself eat those green vegetables. In doing so, I strengthened my writing muscles and nurtured my story.

Did I make every single change? No. But I made myself have a very good reason before rejecting the suggestion.

Bubble Gum: The pleasant, affirming feedback

Who doesn’t like uplifting words of praise—whether on our stories, blog posts, or anything we’re writing? We all need a taste of sweetness from time to time.

I have to admit, I crave positive feedback about my writing. I like to know my words are making an impact in one way or another. Sometimes I get really nice comments from blog readers about how a post helped them. And someday I hope I get feedback from readers about how my stories touched them.

But praise is like bubblegum. It’s delicious for a little while, but then it loses its flavor and we have to spit it out. In other words, I take in the praise, savor the compliment, but then eventually put it off to the side and get back to work. Bubblegum won’t ever fill me up and give me the strength to keep going. In fact too much can even rot me with pride.

So what do I typically do? I chew up my gum and spit it out. Then I head back to the broccoli—the tough feedback—the stuff that will really help me grow.

Even if I don’t particularly like veggies, they're apt to make me a much healthier and stronger writer than the sweets ever could.

What about you? Which do crave more, the bubblegum or the broccoli? Are you forcing yourself to take in the hard feedback? Do you make sure you have a very good reason before rejecting it?

When Reality Hits Our Writerly Delusions of Grandeur

Let’s be perfectly honest. We’ve all harbored thoughts about our writerly greatness at one time or another. These are the times when we secretly hope we’re better than others, that maybe we won’t get rejected 100 times like everyone else, or that perhaps we’ll be a best seller on our first book.

I had one such recent delusion of grandeur. This past spring my editor at Bethany House told me she would be in contact with me when she started doing her line-edits on The Preacher's Bride. Since I was busy writing my next contracted book, I didn’t think too much about those edits.

But then, weeks and weeks began to pass. I hadn’t heard from my editor in so long, at first I wondered if she’d forgotten about me. Then came the delusion: What if she’d already done the line-edits and everything was so good, that she hadn’t found anything major to contact me about?

Yes, I’m chagrinned—I really did think that—but only in passing. Reality hit when I got an email from my editor not long after. It read: I’ve been really busy with other projects and I haven’t started line edits for The Preacher’s Bride yet. When I get into it, I may have a few questions or things to discuss. If so, I will call or email you.

My visions of glory faded, replaced by a cloud of anxiety. I couldn’t help thinking back to the sweat and tears I’d dripped over my substantive edits. And I quickly realized how foolish I was to think I would be spared the line edits. I’d have to do them, just like every other author in the history of publishing.

Why do we have the tendency to think we’re better than we really are? What is it about the human heart that longs to skip over the muscle-straining, back-breaking work? Why do we so often wish for success without the painful process of getting there?

I have to battle against that tendency to think more highly of myself than I ought. During the struggle to stay grounded, I remind myself of these realities:

*We’re usually never as good as we think we are. We may downplay our writing abilities to others, but inside we often think, “I’m good. If only an agent or editor would take a look, they’d see how good I really am.”

While we do need to have quiet self-confidence and believe in ourselves and our dreams, let’s remember there will always be those better than us, those further along the journey. If we hang onto false impressions of our abilities, then we may lose out on the chance to improve our writing skills and stories.

*We’ll always have to make more changes than we anticipate. Contest judges, critique partners, editors, agents—privately we hope we’ll escape the criticism, that somehow we’ll have gotten it all right and won’t need much, if any, editing.

While we do want to strive to have our work the best it can be, we have to accept the fact that change is an integral part of the publication process. We have to know the heart of what’s truly important to us and keep that in our palm, but then be willing to let the rest slip through our fingers. If we cling to our words too tightly, we may miss opportunities that could propel our careers forward.

*We’ll all have to face rejection. Of course we want to be the one who beats the odds. We harbor the hope that our stories will be universally lauded and applauded by everyone, that we won’t get a scathing review, or stinging comment.

While we do want to minimize our chances of rejection by following guidelines and maintaining professionalism, we can’t possibly hope to be perfect or please everyone. We’ll disappoint some of our readers. Not everyone will agree with everything we write in our blog posts. And not every agent or editor will like our stories. And when we try to please everyone, we only spread ourselves out and make ourselves into somebody we’re not.

So, my final thoughts on combating writerly delusions?
Stay humble. Be willing to change. But be secure in who we are.

‘Fess up! Have you ever had any writerly delusions of grandeur? What do you tell yourself to stay grounded in reality?

The Invisible Quality of Character Growth

When my oldest son was younger, I fretted about his ability to focus on his work. During his afternoon chore, whatever that might be, he’d often stop in the middle of it to play.

I’d pass by his room and see him re-building a broken Lego space ship instead of putting away clothes. Or I’d glance into the backyard where he was supposed to be raking only to find him swinging the rake like a light saber. A job intended to take 20 minutes would last an hour.

On occasion I would say things like, “I want you to learn to complete all your work first before you play” or “When you train yourself to work diligently now as a child, you’re preparing yourself to be a hard worker when you’re a grown-up.”

Now my son is on the cusp of becoming a teenager. He’ll turn 13 in about a month. Of course he’s grown physically which is easy to tell when he puts on his jeans and they’re an inch above his ankles. But lately I’ve noticed some signs that he’s also growing in character.

Last week, when I watched him mowing the back yard, he pushed hard and stuck to the task until it was done. Then I thought of other areas, like vacuuming, or shoveling snow, or even folding laundry—and I realized I rarely have to reprimand him to stay focused on the work.

Over the years, he’d grown in character—in diligence. The process was so slow and gradual, that I might have missed it if I hadn’t compared where he’s at now to where he used to be.

Isn’t that how most growth is? The process is invisible to the beholder. Usually we don’t notice the changes until much later, after it’s become more significant.

His growth gives me hope that if I continue to intentionally train my children in specific character traits, they’ll make progress forward. I may not see it while it’s happening and they won’t be perfect, but they’ll grow. Hopefully the same is true of the growth in my own life.

As I thought about how our characters should grow in our stories, I realized it involves a process similar to what I’m doing with my children.

*Narrow down our focus. My children need to grow in many areas. But if I focus on just a few things (or even one) for a time, then I can help them understand that specific weakness and how they can grow in it, instead of discouraging them with everything all at once. Same with our characters. We should pinpoint their main weakness (see this post). Too many issues can overwhelm or confuse our readers.

*Be intentional. I look for ways to encourage my children in their growth. I provide opportunities for them to practice what they need to work on. In our stories, we should be showing our characters failing and making mistakes. But along the way, we can give them opportunities to see their weaknesses and begin moving in the right direction.

*Don’t expect overnight success. The character growth in my children happens in tiny, invisible steps forward. It’s unrealistic to think they’ll change in a day or week or month. It takes time for real and lasting change. And the same is true of our characters. If we wait until the last chapter to suddenly give our characters a change of heart, it will feel contrived and unrealistic. Instead, they should be growing all along in self-awareness and we should gradually walk them up out of dark cavern of their Black Moments.

*Realize they won’t ever be perfect. My son might be growing in diligence, but he’s not perfect in it, and there are certainly other areas he needs to work on. By the end of our stories, our characters shouldn’t be perfect either. They should have their epiphany--that ah-ha moment when they realize their weakness and have begun to change. But they still have a long way to go, just like we all do.

When our readers come to the last page, they should come away with the feeling that our characters have grown in some way, even if it's nothing earth-shattering. Maybe readers won’t notice it along the way, but in hindsight hopefully they’ll see that the pants are an inch above the ankles.

How do you help your children grow in character? Are you intentional? And what about the characters in your stories? Are you intentional enough with their growth?

P.S. If you need a character worksheet, I've posted mine in a tab at the top of my blog. You're welcome to print it out and use it.

Creating Characters that Make Readers Cry

Last week I wrote the Black Moment in my Work-In-Progress. And as you know, the Black Moment is the point in the final act of our stories where our main character hits rock bottom. Of course it’s usually more believable to gradually slide our character down to the dirty, painfully sharp cavern, rather than throwing them off the cliff to the bottom. So, that’s what I’d been working on all along—sliding her down, down, down. . .

I was sitting in my usual quiet corner of the library in a boring three-sided cubicle (which, by the way, is where I do some of my best writing). I was 75,000 plus words into my novel and was at the point where my heroine was nearing the bottom. In previous chapters I’d already heaped one little problem after another onto her so that against the weight she was helpless to do anything but slide down. But now I’d come to a scene where she had to make a crucial, heart-rending decision.

Finally, her feet hit the bottom of the deep dark hole. I found myself there with her. Her pain radiated in my heart. Her tears wet my cheeks. My arms ached with her emptiness.

After I finished typing the last words of the scene, I wiped at my tears and glanced around to see if anyone had witnessed my sob session and wondered if the librarians would now dub me as “that crazy emotional woman over in the corner.”

It wasn’t the first time I’ve cried while writing a scene. And I hope it’s not the last. There’s something incredibly satisfying about moving yourself to tears with your own words. As I pondered what I wrote, I couldn’t help asking myself, “If this scene makes me cry, will it someday move my readers to the same depth of emotion?”

How can we know if we’re creating characters that will make our readers cry? Or laugh? Or love? Isn’t that what we really want? To give our readers the kind of experience that will stir them in their deepest place?

But how do we do that?

I don’t know that there is one easy answer for how to infuse our scenes and characters with such a strong emotional-charge that it elicits a response from readers. Here are just a few ways I work at infusing emotion into my characters:

*Become the character. As I mentioned in the last post, I don’t start writing until I AM my character. When I’m in a character’s POV (point of view), their flushed skin is mine, their blood pulses through my heart, their thoughts run rampant through my mind. We’re one and the same.

*Tap my own emotions. If I AM my character, then it stands to reason if I go to the deep part of my emotional experiences and let them well up, I’ll transfer them to my character. I need only visualize and seep myself in the recent or past memories of my own losses, rejections, or frustrations in order to give them to my character in their own unique way.

*Make it believable. Getting to an emotionally-charged moment requires set-up. If we throw our characters over the cliff to rock bottom, sure they’ll feel pain. But it will feel contrived. Instead we need to establish the crucible--the thing our character can't live without. We need to drop hints at how important this crucible is and then slowly lead our character to the point where they’re forced by circumstances to relinquish their hope, dream, or whatever is critical to them. When we build up to the painful moment, our readers will invest more emotion into it.

*Slow down and show. In those especially charged scenes, I slow down the action and I take the lens of my mental camera and zoom on specific details and emotions. This isn’t the time for a panoramic or big picture shot. This is the time for a close up. I point my camera around the scene trying to capture the heartache in ways that SHOW the emotion and tension I'm trying to convey.

So what about you? Have you moved yourself to tears or laughter during your writing? What are other ways we can infuse emotion into our characters?

P.S. If you need a character worksheet, I've posted mine in a tab at the top of my blog. You're welcome to print it out and use it.

How to Avoid Creating Plastic Characters

When I was judging a recent contest, some entries captivated me and others didn't. One of the problems in the entries that didn't draw me in was a feeling of distance, like the characters were the plastic doll house people my daughters play with. Each figure moved around from place to place and scene to scene, but somehow lacked the breath of life that would make them real.

As I thought about the plastic-feel of the characters, I wondered what makes the difference between real, life-size characters and ones that are small and stiff. How can we move beyond doll-house characters to having ones that feel so alive we’d like to meet them?

I have to admit, I don’t write (or often read) character driven stories. The Preacher’s Bride (releasing in Oct.) is full of action and drama, and the book I’m currently writing is plot-driven as well. But, that doesn’t mean I’ve neglected my characters. In fact, I’ve worked really hard to breathe life into them before I begin the writing process. Here are just a few of the techniques I employ:

*Fill out a character worksheet. Over the years I’ve developed a worksheet that helps me figure out everything I need to know about my main characters—everything from their size underwear to the type of deodorant they use. Okay. Not really. I write historicals and they didn’t have underwear or deodorant. But you get my point! My questionnaire isn’t anything special, but if you’d like to use it as a springboard for your own, I’ve made it available at the top of my blog under the tab: Character Worksheet

*Understand their past. I may not need to know when they had their first scraped knee or lost tooth. But I do try to look for those defining incidents in their past that have shaped them into the characters they are in the present. These are usually the painful, life-shaping events (big or little) that provide the impetus behind their motivations in the story.

*Define the strengths. I try to narrow down the qualities that will help my readers care about the characters. Some refer to these as the “heroic” qualities. I brainstorm a list, then try to pull out a top strength. This is the one I show my character doing in my first chapter, to get my readers caring right away. I also pick out a few others that form the backbone of the character.

*Define the weaknesses. I carefully decide a main inner struggle or conflict that my character will need to work through. This is sometimes called the internal plot which is separate from but woven together with the external plot (and the relationship plot in a romance). The weakness needs to arise organically in the story out of those past motivations that we know but won’t divulge until later to our readers.

I’ve only shared a fraction of what I do to develop my characters. There are innumerable methods and books available on developing characters. Check the Helpful Writing Books list above for suggestions from other writers.

For me, the KEY to avoiding plastic characters is that I don’t start writing the story until my characters are already alive. I usually spend many weeks getting to know them. Finally, I reach a point when they’re living and breathing in my mind. In some ways, I’ve become that person—I’m playing his or her part with my body, heart, and soul. It’s at that point I know I’m ready to start the actual writing.

Yes, I realize I won’t know everything about my characters, that I’ll understand them even better as the story unfolds. But it’s like a marriage relationship. Before marriage we take time to get to know our partner—all their secrets, their past, their strengths and weaknesses. The growing doesn’t stop when we say “I do.” We change and always give our partners new things to discover about us. The same is true of our fiction characters and perhaps even more so.

When we take the time to stoke the passion with our characters and understand them intimately before committing them to paper, then we have a much greater chance of bringing them out of the doll house and onto the stage of life.

How do you keep your characters from being plastic? What are the techniques you employ to bring yours to life? Please share! We’d all like to learn more!

Social Media: Giving Without Expecting Anything in Return

I had a painful sore throat that lingered for weeks. I was exhausted. My children had one illness after another—croup, bronchitis, the stomach flu, high fevers, sinus infection. They only had to be in the same room with each other and the germs would jump with glee off one child and run over the next. All of this within six weeks.

I was on the phone cancelling yet another activity when my friend said, “I’m bringing you a meal and I won’t take no for an answer.”

I stammered, “Oh, I think we’ll be okay—“

“I’ll be over this afternoon. ”

Later she delivered a huge pan of Mexican lasagna, homemade applesauce, and freshly baked blueberry muffins and cookies. And to top it off, she’d stopped by Dairy Queen and picked up small blizzards for each of us.

As I spread out the meal on the table, my daughters looked at everything in amazement and said, “That was really nice of her to give us a meal like this. We’ll need to give her a meal sometime in return.”

“Yes, we can do that,” I started. But then I realized I had a teachable moment not just for my daughters but for myself too. “Actually, Mrs. M. gave us this wonderful meal without expecting anything in return. She wanted to do it because her gift is showing mercy to those in need.”

“Just like your gift is writing?”

“Yes. And when we’re using our talents to serve others, we enjoy doing it without thought of reward or payback from others.”

My friend used her gift sacrificially in a way that said, “I want to give to you, not from what I can gain, but because I truly care about you.”

Her example made me pause and evaluate if I’m using my gift of writing to serve others without thought of reward. In a day and age when sales numbers matter and statistics make or break future book deals, is it even possible for writers to give without secretly hoping it will profit us?

Of course when we write with passion and pour our souls into our books, we give a piece of ourselves. Whether it’s inspiration, hope, or just plain entertainment, we’re giving something through the tales we spin.

But can our giving go beyond that? Are there other ways we can give to our readers—without expecting increased book sales or accolades or anything else in return?

In a recent Marketing Webinar I attended, writers were encouraged to think about how we can incorporate giving into our marketing and publicity. In the internet age we may be able to initially attract readers to our blogs or websites. But what do we have that will keep them there and then foster them coming back? Here are a few ideas:

*Make a fundamental shift in our attitudes. We can start to look at our marketing more in terms of connecting with our readers and giving them something of value without thought of how it benefits us. In other words, we can’t make our social media sites all about us and our books, but should work at shifting the focus to our readers and what they want or need.

*Look for opportunities to give without expecting anything in return. Most of us can smell out the scent of selfish giving—especially those sites that offer us something in an effort to promote themselves. I’m usually hesitant to participate in book drawings or other giveaways that are clearly self-serving, but I'm much more likely to join in when I sense a "no-strings-attached" attitude.

*Find unique and practical ways to give to others. Actual book giveaways are the most popular. But there are other possibilities: resource lists, links to helpful sites, encouraging advice, inspiration. Some websites offer reader pages that include games, quizzes, extra information, etc. The point is to begin to be on the lookout for how we can serve and minister to the needs of our readers.

My friend’s example of selfless-giving is one I’d like to imitate in my writing. It’s one we’d all do well to imitate in any situation. I’d like to get to a place where I can honestly say, “I want to give not from what I can gain, but because I truly care.”

How about you? How hard or easy is it to give without expecting anything in return? Have you ever considered the concept of giving in your marketing efforts? What other ways do you give or have you seen others give on social media sites?

How To Find Blogging Ideas

Have you ever wondered what to blog about? Have you ever struggled with where to come up with ideas for blog posts?

If you’re anything like me, there might be times when you don't feel like you have anything left to say—or at least anything “worthwhile."

A couple of weeks ago writer friend Sandra Heska King said, “I keep waiting for you to run out of ideas. And you keep coming up with such helpful stuff.” Her comment gave me a chuckle, but it also got me thinking.

I tried to analyze how it is that I come up with blog ideas. What gives me inspiration for my posts? What is it that inspires any of us? Are there particular blogging topics writers should or shouldn’t address?

As I’ve labored through the answers to these questions, here are just a few of my thoughts on how to find blogging ideas:

1. Write posts on topics we’re passionate about.

Our posts, like any other form of writing, should be about things that stir our passion and come from the well-spring of our life experiences. When we dig deep into ourselves our voice may begin to come through our posts, and certainly our passion will, no matter the topic. When I’m deciding what to blog about, I usually look for things that really interest me—and then I try to present it in a fresh and thought-provoking way.

2. Read blog posts of others, and when one resonates write a post in response.

Occasionally other bloggers will notify me that something I said sparked a reaction in them, and then they’ll turn their emotional response into a blog post. I love when my words can stir others to reflect or think more deeply about an issue. And I enjoy finding articles that make me think (like Qualman's Social Media Revolution post). It's common courtesy, however, that we reference and link back to the post that inspired us.

3. Find a niche topic that can draw future readers.

Lately I’ve heard the idea that authors should try to find a particular niche for blogging--a topic or theme that can begin to draw future readers who may be interested in learning more. For example, author Sarah Sundin writes historicals about World WarII and she centers her blog posts around interesting facts from WWII. I think this idea can work for some writers, if done creatively. But I'm curious to know how well this method really works in drawing readers. I'd love to hear your thoughts on niche blogging and whether you think it can help.

4. Keep a “Blog Ideas” file and toss potential post ideas into it as you come across them.

We often keep an “Ideas” file for all the notes we scribble during those odd times inspiration strikes us. I do the same thing for blogging ideas. I have a running list of topics that interest me. When I read a post that sparks a thought, I bookmark it. When someone asks a question in the comments, I jot it down. When I experience something new, I make a note. My "Blog Ideas" file is usually full of possibilities. I don’t use them all, but it’s a springboard that helps me plan out posts.

5. Interview other writers who share your niche or passion.

I don’t imagine there are too many published (or unpublished) authors who will turn down the chance for a blog interview. It’s a great way for them to get exposure and also a way for them to connect with others they may not normally see in their cyberspace social circles. Such an interview may generate future post topics, and it's a great way to start forming important relationships.

For more tips on finding blog ideas here are a few other recent posts that might help:

• What Should Fiction Writers Blog About? by Writer's Digest Jane Friedman
• 7 Ways To Spice Up Your Blog Content by Free Blog Help
• How to Find Your Blogging Voice--8 Tips For Writers by Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen

Do you ever have trouble coming up with things to talk about in your blog posts? How do you dig deeper and find ideas? (And be sure to add your two cents about what you think of niche blogging!)

How Essential is an Online Presence to a Writer's Career?

We live in rapidly changing times. What worked for writers ten, five, even one year ago, has changed—and continues to change, especially in the areas of marketing and publicity.

A couple weeks ago I had the opportunity to participate in an author Media Training Webinar by Phenix & Phenix Literary Publicists. It was packed full of great information on how to prepare for and polish radio, print, and television interviews, as well as online publicity. I came away from the webinar, asking myself what’s really going to help my marketing the most and where should I focus my limited time and energy?

Then last week I read Erik Qualman’s post, Social Media Revolution May 5, 2010. He likens the Social Media Revolution to the Industrial Revolution in its scope in changing the world. Here are a few of his statistics:

• “Over 50% of the world’s population is under 30-years-old. 96% of them have joined a social network.”

• “If Facebook were a country it would be the world’s 3rd largest ahead of the United States and only behind China and India.”

• “The fastest growing segment on Facebook is 55-65 year-old females.”

• “Ashton Kutcher and Britney Spears (combined) have more Twitter followers than the populations of Sweden, Israel, Switzerland, Ireland, Norway, and Panama.”

• “Years to Reach 50 million Users: Radio (38 Years), TV (13 Years), Internet (4 Years), iPod (3 Years)…”

After reading such statistics (his post lists more), it’s obvious traditional methods of marketing cannot keep up with the online explosion. Qualman summarizes the trend in this statement: “Social Media isn’t a fad, it’s a fundamental shift in the way we communicate.” And he says this, “Because of the speed in which social media enables communication, word of mouth now becomes world of mouth.”

There are times when we writers look at the social media sites negatively—especially when they distract from quality writing time. But we can no longer stick our heads in the sand and hope Facebook, Twitter, and other social media go away.

If we hope to succeed in marketing, then we MUST go to where people are congregating. And that happens to be online—in a really big way. And it’s only getting bigger.

If an online presence is essential, what can writers do to keep up with the changing times? Here are a few of my ideas:

1. Familiarize ourselves with the online writing industry. There are more writing and publishing related blogs than one person can keep up with. I recommend finding a handful of favorites to read on a weekly basis. In doing so, we can keep ourselves up-to-date on industry standards and happenings. Here are a few places to start:

• Top Five Agent Blogs for 2010 according to Writer’s Digest Chuck Sambuchino
• Best of Twitter according to Writer’s Digest JaneFriedman (even if you’re not on twitter, this list helps narrow down the most helpful writing-related blog posts each week)
• Writer’s Digest Online Magazine contains an incredible amount of helpful writing advice with links to all of the editor’s blogs

2. Don’t be afraid to try out new social media sites. I often hear writers who say they can’t join sites (like Facebook or Twitter) because they don’t have time. My question for those of us serious about publication is this: Can we afford NOT to make the time? If online marketing is truly the way of the future, then why wouldn’t we want to do whatever we can to join in and meet people where they’re at?

3. Know when to jump in. I previously outlined how to set priorities at different stages of the writing career including how much effort we should give marketing in each one. To summarize, I believe newer writers need to spend the majority of time focused on writing. However, I don’t think it’s ever too early to join online communities, meet other writers, and learn about the industry.

4. Don't jump in too fast and furiously. I’ve seen so many writers start blogging, twittering, or facebooking at top speed. They’re excited and spend an incredible amount of time at it. And then they fizzle out. I don’t see them much, and then eventually not at all. They try to do too much too soon and get burned out. Start slow and steady, and be consistent.

5. Most importantly, use social media to build relationships. It’s not a popularity contest or a race to see who can get the most followers. It’s also not a place where we pop in only to share our good news, contest wins, book sales, etc. In other words, it's not all about us. Rather, social media sites are largely about socializing—communicating and building relationships with others.

If you have time, Qualman's video is worth watching:



In light of the video and statistics, how important do you think social media is to a writer’s career? What other ideas do you have for how writers can keep up with the changing times?

The Super-Mom Syndrome

Ever find yourself saying something to your kids like, “I may look like super-mom, but I’m not.”

I’m guilty, especially during those moments when one child asks me for a snack, at the very time I’m cleaning up the spilled milk of another, while one daughter is telling me about her day, and another child is calling me from upstairs.

I stop, and yes, somewhat sarcastically remark, “Hey guys, slow down. You might think I have ten arms and ten legs, but I don’t.”

Lately, I’ve noticed some of my friends putting me in the category of super-mom too. A couple months ago, my daughters were invited to a St. Patrick’s Day cookie-making party at a friend’s house. The mom, a sweet friend of mine, had decorated with streamers, a green table cloth, and cute stickers. She had homemade dough, cookie cutters, frosting, and fancy decorations of every variety. It was little girl heaven.

When I arrived at pick-up time, my friend introduced me to another mom. “And this is Jody. She has five kids, homeschools, and she writes books. I don’t know how she manages to do it all. She’s super-mom.”

Of course I mumbled something like, “Oh, thanks. But I’m not really super-mom. Not in the least.”

But as I walked out the door and thanked her, I said, “You’re amazing. I couldn’t possibly have done all that you did today—with the cookies and decorations and big mess all over the kitchen.” In my mind, at that moment, she was the epitome of super-mom. She’d accomplished something effortlessly that I would’ve had a very hard time doing.

The incident made me think of other friends and their maternal super powers. One friend can organize care packages for shut-ins and oversea soldiers like she was born doing it. Another can grow a garden and preserve her produce better than the early pioneers. And still another involves herself in her children’s theater productions and enjoys all the hours and hours of practice.

When I really stop to think about all my friends, I realize each of them is a super-mom in their own unique way. We all have unique gifts and abilities. Each of us puts forth incredible amounts of effort and dedication to our talents.

As a writing mother, I’m simply using my talent and passion for my writing in a similar way other moms put their hearts into their activities and ministries. What makes us all super, is that we’re striving to use our gifts the best we possibly can.

Yes, there are challenges unique to the writing life. For most of us, writing is an unpaid or underpaid part time job that we try to squeeze around everything else. We have high hopes for publication and our writing is certainly much more than a mere hobby.

But am I super-mom because I’m pursuing my particular passion while I’m juggling all my other roles? I don’t think so. Not more than any other parent who’s chasing after his or her dreams.

So, next time one of my friends calls me super-mom, I’ll make sure to remind them that they are too. And next time my kids decide they ALL need me at exactly the same moment, I’ll remind them that I AM indeed super-mom, but that they can have super powers too!

Happy Mother’s Day to all you Super-Moms.

Has anyone ever called you Super-Mom? Who are some of the Super-Moms in your life? Please share! I love when we can find quiet confidence in our own talents while rejoicing in the strengths of others.

Ways the Writing Life Can Enrich Our Families

Sometimes it’s easy to get our focus stuck on the hardships of the writing life, the heart-wrenching rejections, the countless sacrifices, the hours and hours we expend for so little external reward.

The writing life is hard—not only on us, but also on those who are closest to us. If you’re like me, at times you may question whether the writing life is truly worth the pressure it exerts upon our families and loved ones.

Lately I’ve realized that even though misunderstandings and discouragement are part of the writing journey, there are aspects about it that can be a blessing to those around us—especially as we try to juggle parenting and writing.

*When we pursue our passions, we’re able to bring fresh energy to our parenting.

I spend the majority of my time with my children, overseeing their education and activities, training them, and loving them. When I write, I get a break from the routine of mothering. I have a chance to do something else that takes my attention off my children—even if only for a short time.

Writing rejuvenates me. Yes, it’s hard work and draining at times. But when I nurture my creativity, I refill a place inside me. Then as I return to mothering duties, I’m able to do so with a revitalized perspective that hopefully spills over into the lives of my children.

*When we approach our work time with diligence, we model what we expect from our children.

When my children complain about doing their work, I tell them, “I never expect more of you than I expect from myself.” In other words, I set the tone. When I use my time wisely, stay focused, and work diligently, then I can require the same of them in their work.

I remind my children that they are in training for adulthood. The habits, the learning, the character building—it’s all preparation for the rest of their lives. One of the ways I can prepare them is by my example. When I write even when I’m tired or distracted, I teach them to work when they don’t feel like it. When I finish a novel or two, I teach them the importance of seeing their work to completion.

*When we use our God-given talents with purpose, we teach our children to pursue their gifts too.

I love talking to my children about how each of us is different, how we’re made with special talents and abilities which I call “gifts.” They’ll say, “Mom, you’re gifted in writing. But what’s my gift?” I explain to them that they can usually find their gift by assessing what they’re naturally inclined to, good at, and love doing.

Of course my children are still exploring and discovering those talents. But when they see me using my writing, it challenges them to chase after their gifts and use them to the best of their ability. I make a concerted effort to point out the gifts of other moms and dads so that my children can see the variety of ways they can live purposefully.

*When we show determination in the face of odds, we give our children courage to do the same.

When we had the baby squirrels last week, I watched my one of my daughters do everything in her power to protect and save the babies. After it started to sprinkle, she held an umbrella over the first baby that had fallen from the tree. She sat for hours guarding it from a distance, chasing away blue jays, and waiting for the Mama to reappear.

She sacrificed hours of her time, lost sleep, and put every ounce of her love and energy into caring for them—even though we didn’t know if the babies would survive. I observed her with growing admiration, amazed at her determination and passion. And then it struck me—she’s following my lead. She’s witnessed me pushing forward in the face of rejection and hardship, determined to keep on writing even when it seemed hopeless. Now she's doing the same.

I’m far from the perfect mother. I continually struggle to balance mothering and writing, and sometimes I fail to keep the scale level. But I’m hopeful that as I use my gifts, and you use yours, whatever they may be, that through them we can enrich our families.

What are some ways you’ve seen your writing (or other passions) benefit your family? How does writing make you a better person?

When Life Hits Us and Forces Our Fingers Off the Keyboard

If we’re serious about publication, then we have to be equally serious about our writing time. We need to schedule it in and prioritize it. We shouldn’t approach it with the attitude—“If I find time, I’ll write, and if I don’t, I won’t.” No one will make it far with a haphazard writing schedule.

Most of us know what we need to do, but struggle with the reality of finding a writing routine that works for us. We find ourselves waking up in the dark hours of the morning, staying up too late, and sacrificing sleep. We end up saying no to friends and fun activities in our continuous battle to squeeze in time for our writing.

We try so hard to stay self-disciplined and stick to our hodge-podge routine. But suddenly, BAM—life hits us and forces our fingers off the keyboard. The unexpected, the call of real life shouts at us and demands all of our attention and energy.

What should we do then?

Real life hit me last week in a couple of different ways. If you follow me on Twitter or Facebook, you may have heard about our adventure with baby squirrels. One afternoon last week, my two youngest discovered a tiny creature attempting to crawl around on the ground underneath a scraggly elm tree in our back yard. Upon closer examination we realized it was a baby red squirrel. It barely had its eyes open and could hardly hold up its head.

I quickly cautioned the children against touching it, knowing in some cases parents will reject a baby that has human scent. While they hovered around it, I rushed inside and sent out a cry for help on Facebook and Twitter.

Within minutes, people responded with all kinds of ideas. One local friend sent me the phone number of rescue specialist, and I immediately contacted her. The specialist directed us to leave the baby alone for a while to allow the mama squirrel the opportunity to get it and return it to the nest high in the tree. If the mama didn’t retrieve it by nightfall, we needed to bring it in, feed it water, and keep it warm.

Of course, the mama didn’t show up and so we had a house guest for the night. The next morning we tried again to lure the mama to her baby. But we didn’t see or hear her. By that time, we started syringe feeding Squeakers. As we worked to save his precious little life, we noticed three more baby squirrels clinging to the bark high near the nest.

The short of the long story is that eventually the other three either fell off or crawled low enough for us to reach them. We spent hours syringe feeding all FOUR of them kitten formula diluted with warm water. Over the phone, the specialist walked us step-by-step through what to do and believed something must have happened to the mother. Without their mother to nurse, hunger had driven the babies from their safe nest.

During the busy hours trying to save the lives of the tiny squirrels, I reluctantly gave up hope of meeting my daily writing goals. I knew I could try really hard to squeeze it in and get frustrated with every interruption, or I could just lower my expectations and embrace the chaos of the moment.

Amidst all of the squirrel feedings, the phone rang. It was my husband calling to let me know he’d just received news that his dad was dying and had less than a month to live.

With tears in my eyes, I gazed at the baby squirrel cupped in my palm with its paper thin claws, shivering body, and the formula dribbling down its chin. And I realized at that moment just how fragile life can be.

Yes, we need to have commitment to our writing. We have to set writing goals, push ourselves to stick to them, and viciously guard our writing time from outside distractions. But when real life drops into our hands (sometimes literally) and forces our fingers from the keyboard, we need to remind ourselves that life is short and delicate.

Life is like a hungry baby squirrel clinging precariously to a tree, or a 65 year old man hanging on to each breath until he can say good-bye to his sons. We never know when we’ll lose our own delicate grasp on life.

My encouragement to all of us (myself included) is to use our writing gifts with all of the passion and purpose inside us. But there are times when we need to lower our expectations, give ourselves a break, and embrace the interruptions life hands us.

Sometimes life is too short. We should live each moment to the fullest before it’s our turn to let go.

What interruptions has life handed you? How do you know when to push through the distractions and keep on writing? And how do you decide when to embrace the chaos and give yourself a break?

P.S. A local rescuer expert now has the squirrels in her care. Even though we miss the babies, we know she'll be able to take care of them properly and eventually release them back into the wild (maybe even into our back yard!). And my husband flew half-way across the country and is saying good-bye to his dad.